Age you realized you were gay....

[wildchild36]

Just out of complete curiousity...........at roughly what age did you first realize that you were gay?

Personally, I was about 15 or so, and I had feelings for a female friend, and I was like "Wow, this doesn't feel weird at all...."

Anyone else?

[sunshine6]

I just recently did. I'm not sure if I'm gay or bi. I guess I don't really like labels. It just depends on the person. I can't help who I fall in love with. I do find myself looking at women more often then men though. So for age it's 22.

How old are u now wildchild?? I just ask cuz i need to know if I can hit on you!! LOL! And by the way, welcome to the sexiest site around!! ;)

[be_your_self]

i have always had that feeling i can rember of being gay whene i was little i tould my mom i would marry a woman.........has always been there...

[amidreaming]

GAY? WHO ME? 8O ...im the straightest person on this forum!! :lol: Not a drop of gay in me! :lol:

I have always known i was different but didnt know what made me that way..but i would say that i was around 17..when i met my ex-g/f that i knew i was gay...now when i came to terms with my sexuality..thats different...that was around age 23!

[Dagny]

I found out about 6 months ago. There was a new girl in class and I got a feeling I never had. It was very confusing, but now that I know I'm gay I feel better than ever. I always knew I was different, but I didn't know why. Now I do. Oh...almost forgot: I'm almost 17 (2 weeks to go).

[wildchild36]

I just recently did. I'm not sure if I'm gay or bi. I guess I don't really like labels. It just depends on the person. I can't help who I fall in love with. I do find myself looking at women more often then men though. So for age it's 22.

How old are u now wildchild?? I just ask cuz i need to know if I can hit on you!! LOL! And by the way, welcome to the sexiest site around!! ;)

lol! Why thank you! Right now, I'm 17, turning 18 in October

[CrazyDyke90]

I'm not sure I remember having conversations with my grandmother at like 5 about reincarnation(sp?) and I always remember thinking I wanted to come back as a guy. I actually told my mom I'd just go to the doctor to become a guy when I was 6 (I don't wanna now). So as far as I know I've always known, I just never really thought of myself as actually being gay until about a year ago.

[McLassie]

brought up in a good catholic family, with the usual expectations, Knew their was something different about me about 10, figured it all out soon after, didnt do anything about it till i was brave enough, 25 when i came out, looking back wish i had been able to do it sooner, but ho hum its not been a bad innings

[number13]

**********************

[HoJoFan]

When I look back now I see that growing up I had crushes on girls all along. The first one I remember was when I was in third grade, and she was the star of the school play and in 6th grade (I got an early start to liking older women I guess :-D ) However at that age, and even in high school I did not realize what those crushes were.
When I was 20 I had a crush on a friend and that was the first time I made the connection of what the crush actually meant. Hit me like a brick wall and scared me half to death!
Then after that I spent 7 years lying to myself about my feelings (and actions!).
Finally......I came out when I was 27. What a long road! I really admire some of you ladies in your teens who are so in touch with yourselves. You seem so much more mature and grounded than I was at your age. Bravo to you!

[Diverse_Lindsey]

I knew ever since I developed the ability to love. Probably about 11... 10, somewhere around there. I would wear ties and flirt with girls... I'd always get butterflies with older pretty girls would touch me... :D And now it is even worse... trust me! :lol:

[carol8702]

:) [/b]
I was aroud 5 yrs. old when I realized I was gay. Their was this girl in grade school I could not take my eyes of her. I use to dream about being with her.

[Diverse_Lindsey]

:) [/b]
I was aroud 5 yrs. old when I realized I was gay. Their was this girl in grade school I could not take my eyes of her. I use to dream about being with her.

don't
we
all

[amgirl]

I was about 15 when I found out Im gay... :cool: and now Im 18 out and proud!! :lol: :P

[Diverse_Lindsey]

are you in college amgirl?

[lulu55]

I think I was about 18 or so. I realized that i had feelings for my best friend...then we kinda fooled around a little bit when I was about 19 or so. Then she never turned back after that!!! ;)

[sexyellen]

same for me...18 :D

[crys21ems]

Hi, I am new to this site. I uh, began my first relationship with a woman almost a year ago. I always knew that I liked girls, but growing up I never knew the term for it. I would catch myself looking at girls in gym class, or fantasizing about pretty girls on t.v. My first celebrity crush was on Christina Ricci. When I was old enough to understand what Gay was, I got the sick impression that it was looked down upon and so I felt like I was different, self concious as if I had done something wrong.
It wasn't until a year ago, when I met Rhonda that I finally felt comfortable in my own skin. She is older than I am and had come out at a young age and she just held her head high and looked amazingly beautiful with that confidence of hers. She is actually the first lesbain I had ever really talked to or hung out with... and it just felt so right, from the beginning.

[Ellenfreak]

19 :onfire:

[wildchild36]

:) [/b]
I was aroud 5 yrs. old when I realized I was gay. Their was this girl in grade school I could not take my eyes of her. I use to dream about being with her.

lol! That is so great!

[wildchild36]

Hi, I am new to this site. I uh, began my first relationship with a woman almost a year ago. I always knew that I liked girls, but growing up I never knew the term for it. I would catch myself looking at girls in gym class, or fantasizing about pretty girls on t.v. My first celebrity crush was on Christina Ricci. When I was old enough to understand what Gay was, I got the sick impression that it was looked down upon and so I felt like I was different, self concious as if I had done something wrong.
It wasn't until a year ago, when I met Rhonda that I finally felt comfortable in my own skin. She is older than I am and had come out at a young age and she just held her head high and looked amazingly beautiful with that confidence of hers. She is actually the first lesbain I had ever really talked to or hung out with... and it just felt so right, from the beginning.

Welcome!

[crys21ems]

Thank you so much! you know... I still have so many questions about being lesbian. It's literally something I knew nothing about except that somehow it felt right. So I just went right in and finally feelt, free. But there are questions and advice and things I am just still so curious about, things I havent figured out yet. Like, besides talking to my girlfriend... wanting to know other people points of view.

[wildchild36]

Thank you so much! you know... I still have so many questions about being lesbian. It's literally something I knew nothing about except that somehow it felt right. So I just went right in and finally feelt, free. But there are questions and advice and things I am just still so curious about, things I havent figured out yet. Like, besides talking to my girlfriend... wanting to know other people points of view.

That was the exact same as I was. When I first kind of figured out that I might be bi or even a lesbian, I was like "Holy crap...what the hell is going on?" and the like. But then again, I think I'm still kinda like that now!

[crys21ems]

Yeah, I know what you mean. It was really scary when I finally admited to myself that I liked this woman, but at the same time it was exciting and intoxicating. She made me feel so... I mean I can't describe it. It's this feeling I have never felt before. It lies somewhere between a sexual crave, a forbidden intuition and an exotic exuberence all at the same time. The first time we made love, I was so scared that I didnt know what I was doing... but she just held me and we talked and we touched eachother and it was gentle and passionate... not just a hormonal instinct but this beautiful togetherness! I think making love to a woman is the most beautiful thing!
Uh... Im all lusty right now! :oops:

[wildchild36]

Yeah, I know what you mean. It was really scary when I finally admited to myself that I liked this woman, but at the same time it was exciting and intoxicating. She made me feel so... I mean I can't describe it. It's this feeling I have never felt before. It lies somewhere between a sexual crave, a forbidden intuition and an exotic exuberence all at the same time. The first time we made love, I was so scared that I didnt know what I was doing... but she just held me and we talked and we touched eachother and it was gentle and passionate... not just a hormonal instinct but this beautiful togetherness! I think making love to a woman is the most beautiful thing!
Uh... Im all lusty right now! :oops:

lol exactly!

[Diverse_Lindsey]

*stomps feed on the ground*

Damn, I wanted to be the second lesbian you've ever talked to... OH WELL!

WELCOME! :-P

[lulu55]

LOL too funny DL

[wildchild36]

*stomps feed on the ground*

Damn, I wanted to be the second lesbian you've ever talked to... OH WELL!

WELCOME! :-P

lol

[Diverse_Lindsey]

:oops:

[wildchild36]

sooooo....... :)

[Diverse_Lindsey]

Ahhh yes! 8O

Queer prom is the 14th and my date(s) are my two gay best friends!

[kjih33]

I was 17 when I first finally admitted it to myself, but I kinda new when I was 14 b/c I had really strong feelings for my best friend. I kept thinking it was just this one time, but when I really look back I can remember having crushes of girls on tv at like 11 and 12. Then I thought I was just bi until 17 i finally realized that guys just weren't for me.

[AlterEgo]

I realized when I was 19 or 20, i lived in a very small town and I didn't hear about homosexuallity ever before. OK, that was 15 years ago.
I always tried to fall in love with some guys and thought, it must ok to be happy when they said "no" after telling them about my "love" :lol: I told one of my girl friends about it and she said, she always took me to be gay. "Gay?" I've never been that before... :cool: Then I went to college and life changed in every way.
When I look back, I think, i've ever been gay; I fell in love with some other girls, too, but regarded it as a special friendship, I've had some very close friendships to a few female teachers and I always loved female popstars in a different way. I always thought, this must be usual teeny-behavior and wondered, why this obsession doesn't quit :cool: In the meantime I love it!!!

[wildchild36]

^^I absolutely love your chicken thingy!!!!

[Diverse_Lindsey]

^^I absolutely love your chicken thingy!!!!

you should get an avatar and sig sweetie! :)

[drumchick]

I realized pretty late in life that I was gay. I just turned 27, and I only realized a few months ago that I was gay. It's been a long and crazy journey...very difficult at times...but ultimately I finally feel complete. So it's been the most amazing revelation about myself.

[sunshine6]

I realized pretty late in life that I was gay. I just turned 27, and I only realized a few months ago that I was gay. It's been a long and crazy journey...very difficult at times...but ultimately I finally feel complete. So it's been the most amazing revelation about myself.

We have even more in common! ;) I'm going to be 23 very soon and am finally starting to realize this myself. It's nice to see another person who didn't realize they were gay right away in life. Uggghh, it's such a mentally exhausting process. I'm still not fully there yet where I can say "i'm gay or i'm bi" but I know it's definitely there somewhere inside of me.

[drumchick]

Yeah...it was a hard day to look in the mirror and say "I'm gay," but it was amazing when I did. I had been dating guys forever, and there was just something not right about it. I thought it was just that I hadn't met the right guy. Once I was finally able to admit to myself that I was gay...it just all made sense. So sunshine...no need to rush things. You will figure it all out in your own time. :D

[sunshine6]

Thank-you for that! One of the big reasons I want to move out west is so I can experiment and be away from my conservative family who would definitely have a difficult time with this. I think the midwest is just everyone living in one big conservative box. I find a lot of the people are very narrow-minded around here. Right now I'm just going with the flow and not rushing things like you said. I'm not a fan of labels as I've said previously so whatever happens, happen I guess. :-)

[drumchick]

lol...OMG! You're from the midwest too! Yet another thing we have in common. Where are you from?

[sunshine6]

Ha! Yep! WI.. U?

[drumchick]

I'm from northwest Indiana. Not too far from Chicago. Wow! This is really cool! lol....and a little scary! (but in a good way!)

[sunshine6]

Yes, I'm not too far from Chicago either!! Small world!

[wildchild36]

^^I absolutely love your chicken thingy!!!!

you should get an avatar and sig sweetie! :)

Yeah I should, but I'm just too lazy! lol but I also don't know what I'd use as an avatar and sig! Any suggestions?

[drumchick]

I have the same problem! lol....would gladly accept suggestions!!

[sunshine6]

So drumchick I have a question for you! Did you have an experience or a gf that made you realize you were gay? How did you finally come to terms with it or finally realize?

[wildchild36]

I have the same problem! lol....would gladly accept suggestions!!

Oh yeah! You and me, we so rock!

[drumchick]

*takes deep breath* well...kind of a long story...so I'll try to be brief. Basically I had this friend in High School....and we had a very strange relationship. We were NEVER intimate or anything like that...but it was like this deep connection. We spent hours and hours talking together. Didn't think much of it...thought lots of people had friends like that. I went off to college...she had a year to go. We still remained friends....although obviously not quite the same as in High School. Now we were always affectionate...but this past summer we went to the movies and all of a sudden she hele my hand...and I was like... 8O and then like... :oops: I had NEVER felt like that with a guy. And that basically got the whole process started. It's a really long complicated story...and I think she might also be gay...but that is the jist of how my "journey" began. How about you sunshine?

[chubby]

I was 12 when i realised i was gay. I was 16 when i told my mum. I am now 23

[hidden]

i always felt different, but i could never figure out why. when i was little and went to those day camps during the summer, i was always attracted to the female councellors in some way, but i was so young i couldnt figure it out. it was in grade 8 that i finaly figured it, and it took me a year or so to come to terms with it. i came out to my two best friends about a month ago, and i have a lot less stress.

[Mjoer]

I was 12 years old when I first realised I was gay. I was switching channels on tv and suddenly I saw 2 girls kissing on the screen..then I felt something weird deep inside of me and I started to cry. After that I have had a few crushes on girls and I have told my three best friends about it. They were so happy for me and said they would always support me and love me!! I think Im going to tell others (and my parents) about it when I will be in a relationship. (Im 14 now by the way =P)

[amgirl]

are you in college amgirl?

Not yet :cool: why? :P

[Diverse_Lindsey]

are you in college amgirl?

Not yet :cool: why? :P

Well, you said you were 18 so I was just wondering! Where do you plan on going, what's your major going to be? :)

[amgirl]

are you in college amgirl?

Not yet :cool: why? :P

Well, you said you were 18 so I was just wondering! Where do you plan on going, what's your major going to be? :)

Well...I would like to be something like webdesigner...I really love makeing websites, its my hobby :cool:

[Diverse_Lindsey]

are you in college amgirl?

Not yet :cool: why? :P

Well, you said you were 18 so I was just wondering! Where do you plan on going, what's your major going to be? :)

Well...I would like to be something like webdesigner...I really love makeing websites, its my hobby :cool:

Awesome! That seems like a really big job! :D

[dragonfly77]

This is my first post,really cause I was having a hard time logging on.I have known something was different about me, I had crushes on girls and I don't know if I've been in denial or what but I'm 34 and still have not came out,I'm married and have children. My husband and I had a threesome with another woman a few years ago and that is when it really hit me-everything about being with her felt so natural,needless to say he got upset at us for excluding him.I can't say I'm Bi cause I fantisize about women.I just tell myself that my day will come when I'll fly.

[wildchild36]

Welcome Dragonfly! Hope you like it on the forums!

[MyEverything54]

aww dragonfly.. you need a hug!
i hope oneday you will find the strength to come out.. untill then the girls here will be here for oyu.. were the best!

[gotpink]

i'm also 34 and married and very unhappy because before my marriage i had a 5 year relationship with my gf we were roomates and nobody thought any different. we both decided to call it quits because we new our families would not accept us. so we started dating guys and both got married. we still talk to each other everyday and remain very close and have also slept together since. i will never love any one the way i love her,it makes upset to think about what we should have done different,because i am miserable :(

[amidreaming]

i'm also 34 and married and very unhappy because before my marriage i had a 5 year relationship with my gf we were roomates and nobody thought any different. we both decided to call it quits because we new our families would not accept us. so we started dating guys and both got married. we still talk to each other everyday and remain very close and have also slept together since. i will never love any one the way i love her,it makes upset to think about what we should have done different,because i am miserable

OH MY!!! my advice to you....(if you want it)..Get out of that relationship!! I know its difficult b/c you have children and a marriage..but if your life is miserable, what in the hell are you wasting your time for? We dont have much time here...and it is just a complete waste to be living in misery, when its not necessary!!
You're situation is difficult b/c there are children involved..but if you are miserable in your relationship with your husband, your children will pick up on that vibe! They will notice that you are unhappy..... they may not always listen to what you say..but they are always watching what you do!!!! Children are very observant..and they will notice the change in attitude! if life is miserable..wont it be better for you and your children to leave the situation for something that would make life that much better?
As for your "friend"..it sounds to me like there are really deep feelings there that havent ceased! Do you really want to wonder the rest of your life "what if"? If theres something out there that you will know will make you happy...whats the sense in letting that pass? And the fact that you KNOW that that something is out there for you, and you're too scared to obtain it, is probably making you that much more miserable! You will never be happy in life until you live a life that suites your needs..and makes you happy...as scary as it sounds, if you love her..the sacrifices will be nothing in comparision for what you get in return!!

[JetGrrl]

Grrrr I hate this computer.. I just wrote this massive post and lost it :mad:

You might say I've always known. I always knew I was different anyway. Before I went to school I can remember thinking that something went wrong, that I should have been a boy. That I wanted to grow up and marry a girl, but I didn't know what being gay was. I had the biggest crush on my teacher when I was 5, and I remember showing off so bad because I was so thrilled she came to my 6th birthday party. I knew what I was feeling was different to my friends, I guess thats when I started closeting myself.
At about 11 or 12, I "practiced" making out with a female friend, and it was so good, I never enjoyed the thought of making out with boys like my friends did, and kissing her felt right. But I still didn't click that I was gay, I just thought I wasn't into boys "yet" and that once puberty hit then I would.
When I was about 14 I became really close friends with a guy, and we started dating when I was 16. I loved him so much, lost my virginity to him, but broke up with him because I couldn't love him the way he loved me, I wasn't IN LOVE with him. We had an on-off thing for another 8 months or so but I stopped seeing him completely and tried to 'find myself' elsewhere.
Then at 18 I realised I was in love with my best friend. My best straight female friend. Struggled to hide it for 6 months before telling her one fateful night in Venice. Long story short she ripped out my heart and stomped all over it.. messed me up good and proper. Funnily enough I still considered myself bisexual, until about 5 or 6 months after the 'incident' when one morning I looked in the mirror and said to myself "I am a lesbian" .. and grinned like an idiot :biggrin: because it finally felt as if I had 'found myself' .. like things had fallen into place.
So, you could say I've always known, or you could say the realisation came at 18.. either way, thats my story :cool:

[wildchild36]

Awww sorry 'bout your female friend :-(

[JetGrrl]

Awww sorry 'bout your female friend :-(
Hey no, no pity needed here, in fact I wonder if I should thank her because she's made me so much stronger as a person because of it. It's true, that saying, that what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger.

[wildchild36]

Awww sorry 'bout your female friend :-(
Hey no, no pity needed here, in fact I wonder if I should thank her because she's made me so much stronger as a person because of it. It's true, that saying, that what doesn't kill you can only make you stronger.

That is soo true. And don't forget, whatever happens in your past determines who you are today.

[JetGrrl]

That is soo true. And don't forget, whatever happens in your past determines who you are today.
.... hmmmmm
a dirty filthy minded sex obsessed slutty slutty chicken chasing pervert....
well I know ami would thank the ex-friend for her part in making me that ;) :lol:

[wildchild36]

That is soo true. And don't forget, whatever happens in your past determines who you are today.
.... hmmmmm
a dirty filthy minded sex obsessed slutty slutty chicken chasing pervert....
well I know ami would thank the ex-friend for her part in making me that ;) :lol:

haha! I'm sure she probably would!

[mom_of_12]

Ouch! That one should hurt BUT, you know, it absolutely had to be said. Whether or not she takes that advice is her gig, but she needed to hear the logical option. We were all thinking it, I'm sure, but it takes a no-nonsense (offered as a pure compliment) woman to tell it like it is.

It is a complete waste of a short (those in their 30's already have a true sense of how quickly the remaining decades will pass) life to be miserable UNLESS you are essentially built to be the selfless martyr type. There is nothing wrong w/ that, either, if those actions are what truly please them & make them feel as though they've succeeded @ their objectives: seeing that all those in their lives are happy & fulfilled @ the sacrifice of their own happiness.

Assuming though that she may not be, she owes it to herself to make a decision on what it right for her.

[mom_of_12]

Also...welcome, dragonfly77! :D

[dragonfly77]

Thankyou for the nice welcome,it's nice to talk to real people,it gets old just telling this to my journel.I know I should come out and say I'm gay but it is a very difficult thing for me to do because of the children.It's a matter of time cause what's on the inside eventually shows on the outside.I do know when I tell the ones I love that I'm gay I would feel relieved.

[sunshine6]

Thankyou for the nice welcome,it's nice to talk to real people,it gets old just telling this to my journel.I know I should come out and say I'm gay but it is a very difficult thing for me to do because of the children.It's a matter of time cause what's on the inside eventually shows on the outside.I do know when I tell the ones I love that I'm gay I would feel relieved.

Oh i completely feel the same way!! However I'm not sure I'm "all out gay" yet..maybe bisexual...aaahhh who knows!!!! It's nice to here someone else who feels the same.

[Diverse_Lindsey]

Thankyou for the nice welcome,it's nice to talk to real people,it gets old just telling this to my journel.I know I should come out and say I'm gay but it is a very difficult thing for me to do because of the children.It's a matter of time cause what's on the inside eventually shows on the outside.I do know when I tell the ones I love that I'm gay I would feel relieved.

Oh i completely feel the same way!! However I'm not sure I'm "all out gay" yet..maybe bisexual...aaahhh who knows!!!! It's nice to here someone else who feels the same.

You never have to fully determine who you are, you're unique so don't assume or designate a label for yourself... unless it's cute :-P

[CrazyDyke90]

I was given that label a long time ago. :-P :P HA HA

[sunshine6]

Thankyou for the nice welcome,it's nice to talk to real people,it gets old just telling this to my journel.I know I should come out and say I'm gay but it is a very difficult thing for me to do because of the children.It's a matter of time cause what's on the inside eventually shows on the outside.I do know when I tell the ones I love that I'm gay I would feel relieved.

Oh i completely feel the same way!! However I'm not sure I'm "all out gay" yet..maybe bisexual...aaahhh who knows!!!! It's nice to here someone else who feels the same.

You never have to fully determine who you are, you're unique so don't assume or designate a label for yourself... unless it's cute :-P

Lol! good one linds! I'll accept "cute" anytime and anywhere! ;)

[OCDykeLover]

wow lets see i was...... 13 when i realized i was a lesbian, still am and im still lovin it! i need a girl tho :-(

[wildchild36]

wow lets see i was...... 13 when i realized i was a lesbian, still am and im still lovin it! i need a girl tho :-(

lol, I know what you mean!

[CrazyDyke90]

wow lets see i was...... 13 when i realized i was a lesbian, still am and im still lovin it! i need a girl tho :-(
*runs to catch up with OC* *out of breath* Tada here I am, at your rescue! lol :lol: :-P :P

[wildchild36]

^^lol!

[Slytherin]

Ehy guys how are you??
I'm so sorry for my absence but my computer had some problems . . . but now it's all ok!!!
I miss you all!!! really!!I like this forum so much and when my conputer went to coma.. . .I was desperate!!
But now . . let's talk about my past. . .well . . I always known that I like girls. . . when I was a child I remember that I fell in love with my teacher. . .I never say before this thing before, but I think that all started
with this!! At first I didn't understand if it is right or wrong!!! :P :P
But I understood what I am when I was 16 years old, and now I'm so happy with my girlfriend!!!

[jessie1231975]

I had my first huge crush on a girl in the fifth grade, then I went non sexual for a long time until 12th grade when I developed a very healthy at times and at other times a non healthy crush on a teacher who was very professional through it all. I wish though that she hadn't been at times. I still talk to the teacher...but have never told her of the crush. I guess there was always something there for me...but I would say I didn't start saying that I am gay until I was 17. Maybe 16 in my private world (in my head)...but by 17 I was out loud and proud. I went to a great supportive highschool. Now I would say I'm a well adjusted adult of 29 and been married for 10 years and a few months to a wonderful woman.

[Diverse_Lindsey]

I had my first huge crush on a girl in the fifth grade, then I went non sexual for a long time until 12th grade when I developed a very healthy at times and at other times a non healthy crush on a teacher who was very professional through it all. I wish though that she hadn't been at times. I still talk to the teacher...but have never told her of the crush. I guess there was always something there for me...but I would say I didn't start saying that I am gay until I was 17. Maybe 16 in my private world (in my head)...but by 17 I was out loud and proud. I went to a great supportive highschool. Now I would say I'm a well adjusted adult of 29 and been married for 10 years and a few months to a wonderful woman.

You're my roll model!! :D

[OCDykeLover]

wow lets see i was...... 13 when i realized i was a lesbian, still am and im still lovin it! i need a girl tho :-(
*runs to catch up with OC* *out of breath* Tada here I am, at your rescue! lol :lol: :-P :P

*falls to knee's kissing and hugs crazydyke* thank you soooo much! u rock babe! :wink: :inlove: :D

[CrazyDyke90]

Why thank you :-P :whaasup:

[Diverse_Lindsey]

:-D love is in the air...

[a_true_dory]

WELL..13, it took me a year to realize though...I was dating a bunch of guys and i though *man..these guys are attractive...but why arem't I attracted TO them?* I'm fourteen now...

[wildchild36]

:-D love is in the air...

It sure is

[Maguyver]

I realized pretty late in life that I was gay. I just turned 27, and I only realized a few months ago that I was gay. It's been a long and crazy journey...very difficult at times...but ultimately I finally feel complete. So it's been the most amazing revelation about myself.

I guess "late in life" is relative...how about 43 years old and discovering this about yourself?? I was living a hetero life, husband, kids, house and a dog!
I'm now in the process of undoing all that I've ever known and starting a new path. It is somewhat difficult incorporating the old life with the new--seeing as I'm very much in the closet!! I am keeping it that way for now because of potential ramifications for the kids, but once my youngest is grown, I will be "out". But, I have to agree, it does make one feel more complete just admitting it to yourself that you are gay.

[Maguyver]

Okay, gotpink and dragonfly77, you are not alone!! As mentioned before I too had a husband and kids. After careful consideration, I have pursued divorce and I feel so very free. The kids are okay with it and will survive just fine. I think sometimes we make it worse in our imagination than what it really ends up being in real life. Don't be afraid to forge ahead and do what is good for your soul.

My advice to gotpink is this:
If you are miserable, you should take steps to help yourself to not feel that way. It may be that you eventually need to get out of your marriage, or it may be that you simply need to redirect your life. Get some support or counselling. Either way, you need to do something that will change your misery into something better. Life is shorter than you think--don't waste precious days!

To dragonfly77:
You are on the right track. Chin up girl, be brave and do what you need to do to be true to yourself. I know from personal experience--if nothing else, that it is emotionally rewarding to follow your heart.

[dragonfly77]

Maguyver, your post was like a breath of fresh air to me! Thank you.

[Maguyver]

Maguyver, your post was like a breath of fresh air to me! Thank you.

Ahhh, that is good to hear! I speak the only the truth and it comes from my heart. XO

[MsSpud]

11 or 12 i realized it... 1st acted on my feelings when i was 14, then i dated a bunch of guys through high school i was in denial... then i just accepted the feeling i was having... I'm gay and my current age is 18.

it was a long bumpy road... but i think i finally figured it out... i know who i am! :)

[Diverse_Lindsey]

there's nothing better then knowing everything about yourself and expressing it! :)

[JetGrrl]

there's nothing better then knowing everything about yourself and expressing it! :)

I disagree... I enjoy finding out new things about myself..... knowing that I still have enough unknown that I can still surprise myself...

[Diverse_Lindsey]

point well taken Jet, I agree with your statement. I shock myself with what I learn in a days time about me. :)

[AlterEgo]

I think, the secret's in the sauce :cool:

KNowing yourself and being surprised about yourself both in a good mixture is the best way to walk through life :D

[sunshine6]

there's nothing better then knowing everything about yourself and expressing it! :)

I disagree... I enjoy finding out new things about myself..... knowing that I still have enough unknown that I can still surprise myself...

agreed. we are constantly learning and discovering new things about ourselves. Each day we grow more into our own self....a life long process.

[Diverse_Lindsey]

sunshine6, you've hit the nail right on the head! :cool:

[sunshine6]

sunshine6, you've hit the nail right on the head! :cool:

Why thank you cheeka! :)

[Diverse_Lindsey]

No problema mi hermana sunshine6!

[sunshine6]

No problema mi hermana sunshine6!

No Comprendo Lindsey!! LOL I don't know spanish...I'll need a translation.

[Diverse_Lindsey]

No problem my sister sunshine6! LOL!~ :-D

[sunshine6]

No problem my sister sunshine6! LOL!~ :-D

LOL! Gracias!

[meganzoglio]

lol. i like learning things about myself. but im not gay. well anyway, hey lindsey, whos that girl in your signature? oddly formiliar :cool:

[Diverse_Lindsey]

:D Tu' lindo sunshine6! (You're cute sunshine6) Denada! (You're welcome)

[meganzoglio]

oh yeah happy cinco de mayo...um...yeah...well, lindsey? its been buggin me not knowing :)

[meganzoglio]

oh wow, lindsey where are you? is it like Friday where you are? its only 6:36 pm on thursday where i am...so its Cinco De Mayo for moi. :D

[CrazyDyke90]

oh wow, lindsey where are you? is it like Friday where you are? its only 6:36 pm on thursday where i am...so its Cinco De Mayo for moi. :D
^^ Happy belated Cinco de Mayo!
Or should I say Feliz Cinco de Mayo lol :lol:

[Diverse_Lindsey]

oh wow, lindsey where are you? is it like Friday where you are? its only 6:36 pm on thursday where i am...so its Cinco De Mayo for moi. :D
^^ Happy belated Cinco de Mayo!
Or should I say Feliz Cinco de Mayo lol :lol:

it's friday today, but when i wrote it it was thursday. I'm in colorado! :)

[PaulaInLove]

Geez, I just read thru 8 pages of entries just to say hi :).
Quite interesting tho. concerning myself...."bumpy road" really is kind of an euphemism...lol. I still don't believe how lucky I was....and how awesome my own love story is :D !
Most people who realize that they don't go with the flow exclude themselves from their environment, don't share feelings at all, never REALLY talk to anybody.... and then they fall in love with somebody and eventually are loved back and now they suddenly have to open up and let someone else in their heart...that's what makes it so difficult!!! Anyway...
Just wanted to hint at the fact that I like to meet ppl :-D

[mom_of_12]

Welcome, Paula! :D I hope that you like it here & jump right in the conversations.

[PaulaInLove]

Anytime :) I'll be outta town for the weekend tho....YEEHAAH

[Diverse_Lindsey]

Welcome Paula!!! :)

[wildchild36]

Yes, welcome Paula! :-D

[ilovedory]

I relized I had feelings for other girls when i was 15. But I still thought guys were attractive, but just recently relized that I just think guys are attractive or not, I dont like having "relationships" with them.
Personally for me it was dating people becuase of who they are and not their sex. But I am a lesbian and proud of it. Even though it took forever to relize it.

[PaulaInLove]

Thanks for the nice welcome....
welcome dory-lover btw :-).
I don't know if my parents know about me. Or at least my mom. I think she's a very smart woman but concerning my relationship she seems to be very very ignorant. I just keep observing...for example theirs a guy from tanzania that I know from kindergarten and he's coming over for the summer and wants to spend a week at my house...and I have a large room with two beds and everything so I asked my mom if he can stay here and she was like "in your room? i don't know...not sure how much of a temptation that would be to you...wouldn't you feel awkward blabla"....under "normal circumstances" (if I were straight) I'd understand her concern cuz falling in love with him or whatever would suck but I always thought she realized what's between me and my "best friend"....anyways...sounds like a small issue but I keep wondering about all that stuff. I don't wanna go up to her and be like "mom did you realize i'm dating a girl? or were you stupid enough to miss it?"
everybody else realizes and comes up to ask me....
so what do yall think about it? I'd like to have some opinions on this

[Dagny]

If you have come out to your mom, and she knows you're dating a girl, she shouldn't behave herself this way. It's not fair to you. If you haven't come out to her yet, she might think you're not gay (or not be sure of it) and that might be the reason for her behaviour.
I think that this friend of yours who's coming over should be allowed to sleep in your room. It's not like anything is going to happen. I don't know if he knows you're gay, but if he does, then there is no problem at all.. If he doesn't, i think you should tell him.

[PaulaInLove]

I haven't come out to her yet and I don't want to either...I want her to realize on her own just like everybody else did. My Mom and I have never talked about anything emotional and it would feel so weird to be like "mom I'm madly in love with that girl"
Ango (my friend) doesn't know I'm gay and doesn't particularly care because he's sees me as a kindergarten friend. He'll prolly know anyway when he enters my room cuz of all the pictures..lol. So yeah my mom's behavior is really awkward. All my friends are smart enough to figure it out on their own but not her....

[teenbarbie4u]

i think that comin out to ur parents is one of the most hardest things that u can do , when i told my mom i was gay she laughed we never really discussed it my brother sometimes makes fun of like when they are talkin about kids he always say sis uhave to have a man to make kids he can be such a dumb ass when he is ready , as for what age i realised that i was gay , at the age of 21 ,but when i look back at my child hood i can see there were always signs ,like the dont want to play with dolls only trucks and bikes ,no skirts pants right through ,clikmbing trees and shit like that but it's pretty kool

[Diverse_Lindsey]

Maybe she thought you meant, "mom, I'm happy!" instead of "mom, i'm a lesbian!" why'd she laugh? :bigups:

[sgm69]

Well I always knew I was differenet from the other girls,but I had my first girlfriend when I was thirteen.So you could say I always knew or you could say 13.Either way,I'm still gay (not out yet though)

[HoJo483]

I'd say I REALIZED I was gay my senior year of high school when I actually started having crushes on other girls...my hair dresser was the first crsuh. So, around age 18. Looking back though, no wonder I didn't date anybody after junior high...and if any guy started showing interest in me I would become a total ***** to keep him from asking me out. LOL So, now I'm 22 and have COME TO TERMS, but haven't come out.

[sgm69]

Well after my first girlfriend moved away rather suddenly,it kinda scared me (I was afraid her parents had found out or something) so I tried dating guys for my family's sake so they wouldn't suspect anything.Didn't like it at all so I just stopped.My parents think I'll be alone for the rest of my life.But I promised that if I ever get into a serious relationship with a girl,I'll tell them.I'm 24 btw,25 at the ened of the month.I'm a little :oops: I haven't come out yet when there are people here so much younger than me who have.

[PaulaInLove]

You have come out to yourself and that is the biggest step!!! you've proven to be very brave already! There's no need to come out to anybody if you don't feel that it is necessary...or that you would like to.

I think it becomes more urgent to most people whenever they're in a relationship and then many ppl realize it without you telling them which i think is very nice :-D. They just start wondering about it and already adjust to the new situation that way....I used that method very often so far..feed them a lil information from time to time and if they're smart enough they will know eventually. then they might confront you with it and most of the time they're so embarrassed and nervous at the same time that there's no negative reaction at all!

[sgm69]

Thanks for the good advice Paula,revealing a little at a time. At the same time you get to see what their reaction to the whole truth might be :)