Quotes

[Kayleigh]

Hi everyone i thought it would be fun if we quoted are favourite lines or scenes from the sitcom Ellen, you don't have to quote exactly just the jist of it will do, I'll go first.

Season Two, episode Ten (Mrs Koger)

*Ellen tip toes past Mrs Kogers door and accidently drops her keys*

Mrs Koger:WHATS ALL THE COMOTION!?!

Ellen: I had a really long day, I just wanna go to my apartment. I'm terribly sorry if I disturbed you.

Mrs Koger:Well why don't you spend less time being sorry and more time being quiet.

Ellen:Is this really all you have time for. Just to wait for me to pass by so you can abuse me. Because if it is lets really make it worth you're while. How's this, better?

*Ellen stomps*

Ellen:Or how about this.

*Ellen tap dances*

Ellen:Or why stop there you could follow me around all day long. I make noise all day. I make noise when I drive, I make noise when I work, I even make a little bit of noise when i sleep,

*Snores*

Oh yes farbule feed me the baby carrots. I mean you could spend you're entire day screaming at me wouldn't that make you're richful life more complete, huh?

*A shocked Mrs Koger Slams her door shut*

Ellen:Theres alot more where that came from too.

*Ellen stomps off really loudly just to anoy Mrs Koger more.

[ellen_degeneres_fan_08]

I can't quote it but one of my favorites is 5,000 dollars where she does the puppet show for the little kiddies. :D

That quote of your is funny :Bush or Kerry???? but lets not forget BLAIR The biggest puppet the u.k has got. :twisted:

[laura123]

I really like the episode that was on here last friday. It was the one in which she accidently overtaped Paige's sister giving birth. When they are in the shop looking for a present Ellen saw such a thing you can put above cradle that makes music (srry don't know the name). She then says it's very relaxing and is wondering if they also would have one playing Pearl Jam. Tha't was soo cool I thought!!!! 'cos I'm a great Pearl Jam fan. Srry just wanted to say it..:D

[Bethy]

One from Ellen that I like (I know there are thousands more,but to be fair on me I havent seen many Ellen's 'cos I have to rely on a freind with the channel that shows it to record it for me) is one where She's talking to Spence -i think- about a house full of Air Hostesses being a pipe-dream for the both of them.
______
Elleny Elleny Elleny Ellen-Stay the same,we love you. :D

[laura123]

One I really like too, was the one in which there came a cinema next to Buy the Book. At the end Ellen calls the police and says 'I want to report a missing person (...) no she isn't missing yet, but she will be soon!' That one was so funny!!

[tartanfan]

To her dad harold in 'hello muddah, hello faddah' while playing around with the model trains in 'morganville'-
"Life isnt Morganville, dad. You cant just get on a train and go out of town... because the thing is.. the train doesn't go out of town... it just keeps going around and around"

In 'Just coffee?' while talking to Spence (Spence's line is great too but i cant remember it properly) -
"Het-world?!!! Yeah, I used to love going there as a kid... but yknow in 'Bi-world' I hear they have twice as many rides!"

Womynfest -
"That knock on your door? Its me..."

I'll be back with more soon... :P

[Kayleigh]

I like it in 'fleas navidad' when Spence sings:
http://www.thewrestlingchannel.tv/forums/html/emoticons/whistle.gif
I'll get a tree
I'll get a tree
merry freekin chistmas to me!

I love 'when the Vow Breaks' (Paiges wedding) part 1 and 2 the episodes are histerical from start to finish.

"Don't cry for me Audrey-tina" -Ellen

"I asked heather and she told me to bite her!" -Audrey

and when Paige tells Ellen to walk down the asle and shes does on her own really fast whist Audrey protests "you forgot the pause".

The whole 'heart and soul' thing is equally brilliant.

COME ON PEOPLE SING IT WITH ME

heart and soul
I fell in love with you

heart and soul
just like a fool would do

maaaaaaaaddly
that magic night we kissed.

Last but not least, I like 'makin woopie' when Ellen gets really drunk!

And spence says something like "shes afraid of blackmail" and Ellen says "kims boyfriend?"

Ofcourse I like the song in that two, when Ellens on the piano.

[curbside]

In 'Just coffee?' while talking to Spence (Spence's line is great too but i cant remember it properly) -
"Het-world?!!! Yeah, I used to love going there as a kid... but yknow in 'Bi-world' I hear they have twice as many rides!"

Thats too funny! I haven't really seen any of the Ellen episodes but they all seem hysterically funny!

[hidden]

on an NBC interview with stone phillips:


Phillips: "Your humor has always been good-natured and clean. Have you ever been tempted to work blue?"

DeGeneres: "F*** no. You know, it's..."

Phillips: "Let me ask that question again."

DeGeneres: "Alright."

Phillips: "Have you ever been tempted to work blue?"

DeGeneres: "I'll f***ing say it again. It's not like, I mean, the thing is, it's not like I don't, you know, if something drops on my hand or, you know, like I slam my finger in a car door, I'm not going to say, oh, goodness, that hurts. I'm going to curse."

DeGeneres: "The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhart, by Carol Burnett, by Lucille Ball. I mean, if you put "f***" in front of anything, an audience is going to laugh. You know? It just-- it's easy. And I like a challenge."


hahaha, i love her honesty! :lol:

[trixibelle]

I was just watching the E True Hollywood prog: Does anyone have the script for Phone Call to God?

[scoobyscbstr]

I could only find part of it online.. but I'm pretty sure you can find the whole thing in her book "My point and I do have one"
But here goes:

"I don't understand why we have fleas here because fleas do nothing at all beneficial. But I thought at times like this when we can't figure it out for ourselves...wouldn't it be great if we could pick up the phone and call up God and ask him these things. Just pick up the phone and call up God -- 'Yeah, hi God, it's Ellen...Listen, God, there's certain things on this earth. I just don't understand why they're here. No, not Fabio. No. But there are certain things, I mean, Jesus Christ. No, I didn't mean that. That was great. We're still talking about that. No, I was thinking more about insects. No, bees are great. The honey. That was clever. You're welcome. I was thinking more about fleas...they seem to have no beneficial...[waiting] No, I didn't realize how many people were employed by the flea collar industry...not to mention sprays. Well, I guess you're right. Of course you are...'"

[comedylover]

i found mine online somewhere. i think it was off of "Taste This."

this is how mine sounds:

"..so here's the thing, i feel like that everthing on this earth is here for a reason. thats just my opinion, i think that there are no mistakes. and i think that even if you dont understand why one thing is here, you find out later that it works with the ecosystem somehow. i dont understand why we have fleas here though because fleas do nothing at all beneficial. but i thought at times like this, when we cant figure it out for ourselves, wouldnt it be great if we could just pick up the phone and call up God and ask him these things? just pick up the phone and call up God.... yeah hi God its ellen.. ellen.. degeneres.. de-generes. whats so funny? no i never thought of that.. it does sound like that, doesnt it? i get it. listen if you weren't to busy--- yeah sure ill hold on (somebody's at the gate). onward christian soldiers marching--- yeah. no just singing along to your tape. its not a tape?! they're good! listen, God, there are certain things on this earth that i just dont understand why they're here.... no not fabio. no. but there are certain things, i mean, Jesus Christ... no i mean that! that was great. we're still talking about that! no i was thinking about insects. no, bees are great.. the honey. that was clever. you're welcome. no, i was thinking more about fleas.. they seem to have no benefic--- no, i didnt realize how many people were employed by the flea collar industry. not to mention sprays.. well i guess you're right. course you are! course you are! well you got a little cold, God bless you! bless yourself! you could just bless yourself, couldnt ya? yes im still doing the comedy. uh-huh. oh you got a joke for me? id love to hear it. no, i got time. course you know that more than me, huh? that was a joke. go on. oh, whos there? God who? Godzilla. its incredibly funny, uh-huh. you got another one? whos there? God who? God a dime! WHOAA yeah. i dont have time for another one, no. i just remebered i have an appointment i have to get to. how bout that? God who.. gotta go. cute? stupid.. alrighty. it was good talkin to you too. and ill see---ill talk to you later. alright. buh-bye"

hope i didnt mess anything up lol

[MsSpud]

I've always liked this quote.

"I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that. "

Ellen is funny no matter what the topic. :)

She was AWESOME as Dory.
"Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, what do we do we swim!"

[onetwo]

Can't forget....

"Oh she tripped?...Nooo, shes running. I thought she tripped but she's running. She stopped running, she did trip. You Tripped!!!"

[KP18]

Here are some of Ellen's Quotes that I thought was pretty funny:

"I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her."

"People always ask me 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, I was an accountant."

Oh, you're ready right now? Well, I'm not... Okay. Now I'm ready. You see how I throw my weight around?" (Said to a crew member who was rounding up cast members after a show break)

"I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves."

"Just go up to somebody on the street and say "You're it!" and just run away!"

[Not_Your_Average]

i cant think of any quotes at the moment, but my favourite episode at the moment has to be the one were she is having sex dreams about adam. i havent seen many, ive got freeview so abc1 is showing random ones, really want to see the puppies episode!

[Shady]

"Oh she tripped?...Nooo, shes running. I thought she tripped but she's running. She stopped running, she did trip. You Tripped!!!"

haha yea thats my favorite one i couldn't stop laughing :lol:

(idk if i have this exactly word for word)
"i just tripped on a pebble. Watch out heres a pebble there. Someone should put an orange cone there or something."


and when she sings "shoop"

[RedBoss18]

I think the best line i ever heard from her is " WHY WATCH TV WHEN THERE'S A BETTER ENTERTAINMENT" -ITWCT2

:inlove: :oha: :thumbsup: :biggrin: