Paula's Therapy Corner

[PaulaInLove]

I'm intending to expand my business! :lol:
So if you have any problems love- or sex-wise (in case of the later please spare me with too intimate details - just the facts) and seek a heart-felt and honest advice, you're more than welcome to post here.

;-)

[moefish]

Omg loves it!!

I have a problem... My gf only LETS me sleep in her bed on weekends.. What should I do?

[PaulaInLove]

HAHAHA oh my god. Svenja and I are laughing so hard right now. Can I get back to you on this when I come home drunk from the club tonight? :-) No seriously we gotta go ;-). I will come up with a strategy, tho, I promise.

[dalaj_l]

- What I have to do to date U? :D

[moefish]

HAHAHA oh my god. Svenja and I are laughing so hard right now. Can I get back to you on this when I come home drunk from the club tonight? :-) No seriously we gotta go ;-). I will come up with a strategy, tho, I promise.


Ok missy moo I'm holding you to that... I'm anxiously awaiting your expert advice...

[lostioz]

ok Pauli here is my question, how do I get a woman in my bed, at least on weekends?

[Musofan]

We'll keep it cleannnnn

Mmmm... does that involve soap and the shower :?:

Put my name down for that!!!!! :onfire:

[moefish]

We'll keep it cleannnnn

Mmmm... does that involve soap and the shower :?:

Put my name down for that!!!!! :onfire:

Ohhh sassy.. I don't know you'll have to ask poppy paula that question.. With this being her corner and all!!

[Shady]

Paulas a genius!

[roxyrocks]

i agree with most of you guys. i've been reading paula's posts and they're great pointers and advices. thank you for the offer and hope you won't get tired.

[Reebi]

Please pick up an application, draw a number and wait in line.
;-)



Uh huh, you know I've got application number 1 :P

[genelee16]

hi paula,

first of all, i would like to say that i like your sense of humour and your approach on relationships. oh, you seem really experience. So a little help here...

hmm... i have been with my gf for 1 year now, and the feeling is a little different, i used to be very much into her, in the beginning of the relationship, but now the feeling has kind of died down. Something like "lover's fatigue". And i know, even though we haven't been through much rough times, she love me a lot. I was wondering whether i can do anything to rekindle that obsessive feeling, that strong attraction, like when you first meet her?

And one more note, i tend to take my gf for granted and become mean at times to her... any advice? (i'm kind of the impulsive type) :P

Thanks in advance, doctor love!

[PaulaInLove]

Please pick up an application, draw a number and wait in line.
;-)



Uh huh, you know I've got application number 1 :P

No waiting in line for my Hotbuns. You get my secretary's comfy chair ;-).

[moefish]

Thanks for yourrrrrr fantastic advice fortunately for me, that isn't a problem I have... Just someone I know... But you're fantastic and your advice is always welcome!! Look at you miss popularity everyone loves paula!! Svenja looook out!!

[lostioz]

Svenja looook out!!
please stop using this name :mrgreen: it reminds me on someone

[PaulaInLove]

Hehe, we needa make up a code name for her, too. More advice tomorrow...

[Musofan]

Hehe, we needa make up a code name for her, too. More advice tomorrow...

Maybe you should run a competiton for a code name. I'll put my entry in advance.... "lickitysplits" ;)

[Reebi]

No waiting in line for my Hotbuns. You get my secretary's comfy chair ;-).
Nice to know I can relax.....

[PaulaInLove]

No waiting in line for my Hotbuns. You get my secretary's comfy chair ;-).
Nice to know I can relax.....

You KNOW your on top of my list. Your man's gonna be my babies' daddy, remember? ;-)

[Reebi]

Oh yes, that's the reason why I'm with him...gotta help a sister out, right?

[PaulaInLove]

HAHA that's right. Don't tell him that, though ;-). How's school hotbuns?

[genelee16]

hey shrink,

thanks for the reply. :lol: You've really got some awesome advice! i'm going to bring her out on a date as soon as we finish our exams, then try out some of your ideas. hee.

[diva_o]

Seriously where have you been Miss Paula I need some serious therapy,

Indeed I do!

Since returning to the site after being m.i.a for some months....... I keep thinking that people are answering them selves but may be it's juss my fragile mind!?

How much for a session on your couch?

[moefish]

Miss Diva, I think it might be your fragile mind...

[moefish]

I mean, honestly who replies to themselves? I think you might need more help than poppy paula can give you...

[diva_o]

moe how rude

[diva_o]

well quite clearly shes right....

[Stellerk21]

I have a question for you Paula.
What to do when you fall madly in love with someone who is taken? :?: :?

[Elise]

Oooh niice idea :)
I think you have to ensure that that person left the other person for u... ( I don(t know... I watch too many films... just ask Paula :P )

[PaulaInLove]

Since returning to the site after being m.i.a for some months....... I keep thinking that people are answering them selves but may be it's juss my fragile mind!?

Is it really people or just one person? :-D
Since we're ALL so LOVING and ACCEPTING...just like a family...just ignore it ;-).

How much for a session on your couch?

Depends on how worn out the couch is when you're done...if you intend to cry and wipe your nose in it you better bring the check book. Most people don't carry that kinda cash.

I think you might need more help than poppy paula can give you...

Are you questioning my qualities Honey?
:lol:

[moefish]

Miss Paula I could never doubt your ability... I just know all of diva's nonsense, so I know it's a lot to handle, but if anyone can cure her, I'm sure it will be youuuuuu :) :)

[diva_o]

Paula pops I promise I wont wipe my nose on your couch! I'm fact I may do a tom cruise type leap about on it instead......Thanks for your infinite wisdom, Yoda has nutthin on you, I will in fact ignore it, unless I get the immense urge to juss join in, that could be fun ....

My dearest Moey moooo, I can not believe you would air the fact that I am full of nonsense when your clearly knee deep right in there with me! So the sheepish attitude will not wash lady luck!

[geo]

Oooh niice idea :)
I think you have to ensure that that person left the other person for u... ( I don(t know... I watch too many films... just ask Paula :P )

ok just outta curiosity how would u feel if the person you were dating left you for someone else??

[PaulaInLove]

What to do when you fall madly in love with someone who is taken? :?: :?

Geo is right, saying that it would suck to destroy a good relationship.

Good relationships are:
have been dating for a while
are older than 17/18
are happy
love each other
did not meet and make out at a club while drunk :-)

Well, I trust you enough to distinguish yourself in what state these two are.

If you don't give a thing about their relationship or know it sucks anyway, you just want the person to be with you, try something like this:

You need to be the nicest, funniest and most flirty person you can possibly be.
Is it a girl? I'm just gonna assume it is...
Ask her out for coffee like once a week, be fun and easy going. If she cancels because of her bf/gf do not be mad but understanding and accepting. (That gives you credit for later, in case her partner is jealous at all...you'll be the cool, uncomplicated chick then).
Never ever say you don't like her partner until she brings it up first...if she does, stay as objective as you can.
And even if her partner is beating her, hides her fave stilettos in the oven, ties knots in the sleeves...the likes...never tell her to leave him/her unless she brings it up first.
This involves tons of patience but I think it's the only way to get into someone's heart. If you're too aggressive she'll feel threatened...she needs to think you're her best friend, that she can trust you and feel safe around you.
Oh, and most importantly, don't talk about anyone else, don't make out at parties or clubs, make it about her and let her know you'd be available :-). At the same time don't crush her with your love...it's a balancing act, I know.
Maybe it helps if you tell yourself that you're pretty happy being around her already. It's better than losing her completely...etc. You can influence yourself like that...it works on me all the time.

Pretty loooong text, sorry 'bout that. I hope it helps somehow...this doesn't necessarily work for guys, so if it's a boy get back to me on that.

[Stellerk21]

Thanks for the info I hope it will help my situation out. I have tried some of those things before and it did bring us closer together. Thank you again! :-D

[ruleruvzworld]

Paula,can you get me a date with Heidi Klum?Natassja Kinski,Katarina Witt,Mia Hamm,already said no. :oops: :oops:

[PaulaInLove]

Paula,can you get me a date with Heidi Klum?Natassja Kinski,Katarina Witt,Mia Hamm,already said no. :oops: :oops:

Unless you're black and have a scarred face I don't think I can do anything for ya.

[ruleruvzworld]

Well,if these two can hit it off,what do i got to lose?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUTwaSPcGno

[ruleruvzworld]

- What I have to do to date U? :D

"Be her breakfast" according to the profile...

[Elise]

Geo is right, saying that it would suck to destroy a good relationship.

Good relationships are:
have been dating for a while
are older than 17/18
are happy
love each other
did not meet and make out at a club while drunk :-)

Well, I trust you enough to distinguish yourself in what state these two are.

If you don't give a thing about their relationship or know it sucks anyway, you just want the person to be with you, try something like this:

You need to be the nicest, funniest and most flirty person you can possibly be.
Is it a girl? I'm just gonna assume it is...
Ask her out for coffee like once a week, be fun and easy going. If she cancels because of her bf/gf do not be mad but understanding and accepting. (That gives you credit for later, in case her partner is jealous at all...you'll be the cool, uncomplicated chick then).
Never ever say you don't like her partner until she brings it up first...if she does, stay as objective as you can.
And even if her partner is beating her, hides her fave stilettos in the oven, ties knots in the sleeves...the likes...never tell her to leave him/her unless she brings it up first.
This involves tons of patience but I think it's the only way to get into someone's heart. If you're too aggressive she'll feel threatened...she needs to think you're her best friend, that she can trust you and feel safe around you.
Oh, and most importantly, don't talk about anyone else, don't make out at parties or clubs, make it about her and let her know you'd be available :-). At the same time don't crush her with your love...it's a balancing act, I know.
Maybe it helps if you tell yourself that you're pretty happy being around her already. It's better than losing her completely...etc. You can influence yourself like that...it works on me all the time.

Pretty loooong text, sorry 'bout that. I hope it helps somehow...this doesn't necessarily work for guys, so if it's a boy get back to me on that.

I think you don't have to be older than 17/18 to have a good relationship there are soooo many people who have a good relationship and they are not older than 17/18 ....

[PaulaInLove]

Sorry, Elise, I knew it would cause controversy but that is my opinion.
I do believe that you can have a good, honest relationship, that you can learn from as well, when you're under 17 but I don't think it is meant to last. Statistics are on my side here, too.

[genelee16]

well, i know the point that Paula is coming at...

Personally, i feel that 'you' should be the one who know where the whole relationship is going, (esp. for budding lovers) sometimes young love is like puppy love... it's just like a passing phase, so as young and immature as MOST youngsters are (18 and below), love can be very much trivial... and of course a phasing phase... also, as you get older, you tend to find better partners...

my gf and i are 18 this yr and one year into the relationship, but we talk about living together, having our own house, car, cats, dogs, etc... We look forward in having a quality relationship... cause now we're still studying... Well, i have no idea what's going to happened in the future... but i sure do will cherish my baby now... :)

[treiner]

Ahh, here it is! Great thread, sweetie. Now...I must think of a question for you. Let's see...

[PaulaInLove]

Challenge me, Baby!

[lostioz]

Paula-Liebling didn’t you have something to do? I remember something called housework, correct me if I’m wrong

[treiner]

Housework??? Pah! It's Sunday! :lol:

[PaulaInLove]

Losti-Hasi, is that a topic you need counseling on or are you just intruding my peaceful thread?
I ain't cleaning if mademoiselle Girlfriend ain't cleaning.

[treiner]

Ok Paula...I have often wondered about this...what do you think is best? Natural, trimmed, or shaved?

[ruleruvzworld]

I assume you mean the face,not hmm HMMM!

[PaulaInLove]

Ok Paula...I have often wondered about this...what do you think is best? Natural, trimmed, or shaved?

Since we can't discuss sexual content all that much on here I can't go into details here....

...let's just say everyone would want to go and get a hair cut once in a while. You would want it to look accurately and cared for...the rest is personal preferences.

[scully4ever]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Wow...the information you get in this "Therapy Corner" is amazing. Serious problems ;-)
After reading too much of the stuff that´s written here you really need a psychiatrist :lol:

greets to the "doc" ;-)
scully4ever

[PaulaInLove]

Thank you, Scully, should you ever have a problem, just come and talk to me. I'll think up something crazy to save your life :-D.

hihi I crack myself up everytime I say sumn cheezy like that.

[diva_o]

Dr Paula!!

I have a crush on an older woman at work and she knows about it, and winked at me!! What the hell do I do??

Heeeeelp!!

[scully4ever]

Ok...Paula, Paula!!!! Let my try!

Dr Paula!!

I have a crush on an older woman at work and she knows about it, and winked at me!! What the hell do I do??

Heeeeelp!!


Wink back?? :-D
greetings scully4ever :P

[diva_o]

I smiled! we had an elevator moment!

[PaulaInLove]

Dr Paula!!

I have a crush on an older woman at work and she knows about it, and winked at me!! What the hell do I do??

Heeeeelp!!

Sorry I haven't gotten to this yet but I somehow lay it off at first and then forgot about it. I hope you can forgive me.

So I have some further questions:

How does she know you have a crush on her? Have you told her? Is it common knowledge?
And most importantly how old? And is she taken?

Three interpretations for the elevator moment:
1. She's friendly and winking is her thing.
2. She's friendly and somehow wanted to get across that she thinks you're fun/likes you. This does not have to be a crush on her side..just a bond between you two of some sort. It could be, though.
3. She wants to convey that she doesn't mind the circumstances and is making it a lil fun but that she's not interested at all.

How to deal with it:

For a more precise analysis I would need more information but a general advice is: make it all humorous and as though you're dealing with it very well.
In case she asks you to do anything for her, go "How could I deny YOU anything?"...that kinda stuff. Just be flirty but make it look as though you didn't have any hopes.

I hope this helps any although some time has passed since you asked that question...
Cheers

[PaulaInLove]

Anyone else? :-) The soccer game is kinda boring...

[Elise]

well euh.. now you're asking for it... I have a little problem... I need to play a role that I'm in love with somone (a guy) And I realy can't do that It's horrible but I can't and even I know it's a role... And our teacher always say that it's not good an :( I don't like it... And the boy is 19 and I'm 15 8O

[PaulaInLove]

Ugh, I knew I wouldn't be spared with something about a boy (ding ding book title :-)) at some point...

Is this for a play? Are you theatre class? Are you any good at telling yourself something that is not true?

The only way I see out of your dilemma is that you imagine him to be the girl you've always had a crush on...or someone you really like. In other words you have to act. This is prolly what your teacher has told you but there's not many other possibilities. Do you have to get physical at all?
Try and be the best heterosexual you can be..it might come in handy at some point in your life, too.
And if you tell me more about the play you're doing, maybe I can give you more practical ideas?

[me_and_u]

Is it wrong that i am attracted to older women??..im 16 years old and i CAN NOT stop thinking of her..shes like 41! Are women that age ever attracted to girls my age??
HEllpppp!!!!!!!!!

[mamacan]

I am going to put my two cents worth in here.....first of all, it would be against the law in most states, assuming you are in the US, for a 41 year old to have a relationship with a 16 year old.
Now, the other issue is that I would be very concerned about a 41 year old who would pursue a relationship with a 16 year old.....that is just too great an age difference to make any kind of real lasting relationship out of......my concern would be more for the inexperienced and impressionable younger person who could be taken advantage of in such a situation.

[mamacan]

A follow up to my previous post.....I don't guess it is so wrong to be attracted, so long as you don't act on it, and most especially if the person you have the crush on doesn't act on it.

[me_and_u]

thanks for ur advise...i would never act on that tho..but i does seem like she acts on it sometimes. Sometimes i get the feeling that shes flirting with me in a way. But i thought i was only against the law for a GUY over 18 2 be with a GIRL under 18??...im scarein myself cuz all the sudden i feel attracted 2 other girls! and that makes me confused and a little embarresed :-(

[genelee16]

i do get attracted to older women too! they just got something special that i can't explain...

anyway, your attraction may be a form of admiration... well, i don't know for sure... Good luck!

[Elise]

Ugh, I knew I wouldn't be spared with something about a boy (ding ding book title :-)) at some point...

Is this for a play? Are you theatre class? Are you any good at telling yourself something that is not true?

The only way I see out of your dilemma is that you imagine him to be the girl you've always had a crush on...or someone you really like. In other words you have to act. This is prolly what your teacher has told you but there's not many other possibilities. Do you have to get physical at all?
Try and be the best heterosexual you can be..it might come in handy at some point in your life, too.
And if you tell me more about the play you're doing, maybe I can give you more practical ideas?
Yes it's a play But my teacher doesn't know I realy don't like this scène he thinks I have had lots of boyfriends but I never had and I think I'm not going to have one in the near future... Well I'm lucky that we don't have to kiss (I hope so) If we need to kiss I'll say Never! (I know it's silly :? ) We only need to act that we are in love and cuddle and bwéék! :( :mad: u know act that we are in love :oops: :( I almost had night mares about that 8O

[debby]

hi paula, i´m new but i already read some stuff from you, and love it! great advices.

i´m 23 and just discover my real orientation, i allways tried to be straight and all i did was a lie to myself. i was never happy with my realationships or satisfied, but i didn´t want to see the truth. i saw it coming all my live but i didn´t wanted to be different.

now i want nothing more than beeing happy with a woman, i´m going crazy about my changing feelings, i restrained them to long, and now i´m a little scared about my future but more excited. i already told my brother and my 2 best friends, and they kind of known anyway and support me with everything.

now to my problem, i can´t come out jet, especially not at work... but i do want to come in contact with girls. so how can i get the chicks without going to "the" locations. you know i work in a hotel and know many gay and lesbian in the business so if i would go to a lesbian bar and one recognizes me, than i´m out of the closet :-(

i don´t know maybe i´m just paranoid and scared at the first step... i hope you can help me in anyway.

liebe grüße debby :P

[PaulaInLove]

Hey Debby, thanks for consulting the therapy corner, I was kinda getting upset that noone seeked my advice anymore :P!

I do understand your point of not being ready to come out yet. It's a big step and you never know how your co-workers will react to that. So I'd say be real careful.
About the chicks:
It heavily depens on the 'interaction' :-) you wanna have with a girl. Are you trying to get laid or are you looking for a decent relationship?
If you're going for the later I'd say there is no real place you can look for one..just be patient and see who you fall in love with. As ya'll know: Most girls are straight until they're not!
So it doesn't really matter if she has ever thought about being with a girl...she will, once you've showed her the money :lol:.

About getting laid, I'm not too sure. It's not really my thing so I don't have all that many experiences with it...practically none.
My girlfriend says to put an ad in the local newspaper or magazine :-D. Or come up here..this is gaytown, we'll find you one in a nanosecond!

Losti's not taken :-). She might be up for some action. Where do you live? :lol:

Anyway, hope it helped somehow...if you've already laid your eyes on someone, maybe we can find a way to get to her...

[lostioz]

Losti's not taken :-). She might be up for some action. Where do you live? :lol:
already checked that, she lives near Frankfurt but thanks for thinking of me :-D

[PaulaInLove]

Losti's not taken :-). She might be up for some action. Where do you live? :lol:
already checked that, she lives near Frankfurt but thanks for thinking of me :-D

Always Baby! Can't you guys make it a weekend-thing? That would be so Sex and the City.

[lostioz]

If anyone is interested please send me your personal data sheet and photo via private message.
I have no financial interests!

[debby]

Losti's not taken :-). She might be up for some action. Where do you live? :lol:
already checked that, she lives near Frankfurt but thanks for thinking of me :-D

Always Baby! Can't you guys make it a weekend-thing? That would be so Sex and the City.

lol love you guys! :P

i don´t just want to be laid, i´m looking for a decent relationship or even some talking with girls who understand what i´m going through right now.

[PaulaInLove]

If anyone is interested please send me your personal data sheet and photo via private message.
I have no financial interests!

HAAAA, love it, KFI! Die Mox lässt grüßen.

[lostioz]

Also debby, wenn du ein Auto hast bis du in 4 bis 5 Stunden in Oldenburg. Wenn du jemanden finden willst, dann in Oldenburg. Wir setzen uns in ein Cafe und warten 10 Minuten, die Auswahl dürfte für dich dann groß genug sein. Oldenburg heißt nicht umsonst gaytown. Ich konnte es am Anfang auch nicht glauben.

[PaulaInLove]

Ich bin auch immer wieder erstaunt. Aber wir übertreiben wirklich nicht.

[debby]

wow wenn ich nicht gerade gestern einen autounfall gehabt hätte... wäre ich doch sehr gerne mal nach gaytown gefahren! cool werde ich aber bestimmt nachholen.

[genelee16]

You guys are hilarious... :lol: :lol:

Anyway, i always thought lostioz was a guy. Wow, i dicovered something new! :P

[PaulaInLove]

HAHAHA omg she's gonna be thrilled to see this when she gets home.

[lostioz]

Hola here I am again, nice to hear that. But I am definitely female, last time I checked

[PaulaInLove]

Lostiiii, the pictures! Have you watched the ep? How did you like it?

[soozi]

paula, u know any cures for insomnia?!

[PaulaInLove]

Sex, soozi. And alcohol.


You could try getting rid of the thoughts that keep you from sleeping as well...do you know what they are?

[lostioz]

Lostiiii, the pictures! Have you watched the ep? How did you like it?
yeeees the pictures, I have them and they're gorgeous :-D
How do you want me to send them to you?

[PaulaInLove]

Either you email me or we catch each other on msn :-D. I talked to Moe this morning and she's waiting anxiously.

[lostioz]

get yourself a drink, you'll be thrilled :-D

[lostioz]

heyyy Moe, do you feel better? ;) Paula said you liked the pics http://www.cosgan.de/images/midi/froehlich/a010.gif

[moefish]

Heyyy lostiii-
I absolutely LOVED them, I still am having a hard time finding the right words to describe their beauty... You're fantastic and it totally made my day!!

[PaulaInLove]

Moe says, you're her hero, Losti. The gf and I are mesmorized!

[lostioz]

You can pay me later. glad you enjoyed them as much as I did :-D good night and cheers

[soozi]

thanks for the advice paula...alcohol certainly works, now i just gotta find someone to try the sex bit out with... ;)

[lostioz]

alcohol certainly works, now i just gotta find someone to try the sex bit out with... ;)

Losti's not taken :-). She might be up for some action. :lol:

:biggrin: just thought I'd mention

[soozi]

ok then losti....just get on a plane over here!

[lostioz]

ok then losti....just get on a plane over here!
nah I take the ship. Do you have beer at home? how old are you by the way?

[lostioz]

ok then losti....just get on a plane over here!
oh and don't call me "losti" losti-hasi is Paula's property

[PaulaInLove]

ok then losti....just get on a plane over here!
oh and don't call me "losti" losti-hasi is Paula's property

Exactly. You better watch out...the Lord sees everything!

[soozi]

oops... :oops:

I'm 19...and i have crateloads of beer :-D

[annak84]

Lostiiii, the pictures! Have you watched the ep? How did you like it?

:eh: which pics and which ep? excuse my curiosity. :cool:

[lostioz]

:eh: which pics and which ep? excuse my curiosity. :cool:

We were talking about my pin up pictures and my secret sex tape.

[moefish]

:eh: which pics and which ep? excuse my curiosity. :cool:

We were talking about my pin up pictures and my secret sex tape.



waittttttt pin up pics? sex tape? paula is holding out on me!! terrible terrible terrible....

[lostioz]

waittttttt pin up pics? sex tape? paula is holding out on me!! terrible terrible terrible....
I think Paula was jealous, my leather outfit was just too sexy

[moefish]

^^ PAULA that is terrible, dont be jealous of losti!! and send the sex tape my way!!

[annak84]

:wow: didn't know you're such a naughty girl, lostioz.

[lostioz]

:wow: didn't know you're such a naughty girl, lostioz.

let me quote a song:

"we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and
Show ourselves
When everyone has gone"

[soozi]

lostioz, hope u gonna show me this side when you get the boat over here :cool:

[lostioz]

baby I'm gonna show you everything. so when will you send me a pic of you? either you pm me or you can add me to msn ;) can't wait ;)

[annak84]

baby I'm gonna show you everything.

show it to me too please. ;) :cool:

[lostioz]

baby I'm gonna show you everything.

show it to me too please. ;) :cool:
ok go to www.sexybunnies... ;)

alright stop it please this is non of your business :cool:

[Stevearino]

I'm intending to expand my business! :lol:
So if you have any problems love- or sex-wise (in case of the later please spare me with too intimate details - just the facts) and seek a heart-felt and honest advice, you're more than welcome to post here.

;-)

Does size really matter to you gals??????? 8-)

[lostioz]

Does size really matter to you gals??????? 8-)
ooo heavy question I can't give you an answer on that
Paula what do you think?? ;) can you help him?

[PaulaInLove]

Does size really matter to you gals??????? 8-)
ooo heavy question I can't give you an answer on that
Paula what do you think?? ;) can you help him?

You were referring to burgers, right?

[Stevearino]

You were referring to burgers, right?

Nein!Knockwurst!

[genelee16]

you gals are having so much fun.. can i join in too? :P

[lostioz]

you gals are having so much fun.. can i join in too? :P
The golden rules to join this conversation

1. It's all about irony
2. Our humour is just another defence against this crazy forum-always remember that
3. Paula is always right
3.1 Whenever in doubt ask lostioz
4. It’s all about burgers!
5. No one is interested in your real sex stories (see rule 1)

…to be continued


last step to join our conversation: we need your age, relationship status and a pic, please feel free to pm Paula or me

[moefish]

you gals are having so much fun.. can i join in too? :P
The golden rules to join this conversation

1. It's all about irony
2. Our humour is just another defence against this crazy forum-always remember that
3. Paula is always right
3.1 Whenever in doubt ask lostioz
4. It’s all about burgers!
5. No one is interested in your real sex stories (see rule 1)

…to be continued


last step to join our conversation: we need your age, relationship status and a pic, please feel free to pm Paula or me

you are my hero...

[ellen4prez]

paula, i have a question.

i am in love with my best friend. we are both girls, 19. i am gay, she is not, what should i do?

[scully4ever]

Hi Paula!
I have a question as well.
SOMEBODY is not answering a question I was asking, so maybe you can help me with it. :) Here it goes:
@ PaulaInLove: Ok off-topic now....sorry.
Just wanted to ask Paula something.
In your signature it says: "When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt."
Did Ellen say that or where did you get that from?? I really like it.
Thought about a translation in german, but I couldn´t come up with anything that really fits. How would you translate it??

greets scully4ever

scully4ever[/b]

[Stevearino]

5.No one is interested in your real sex stories






what good is she then?????

[Stevearino]

4.It’s all about burgers!

OK Paula,what's the internal temperature of a bacon double cheeseburger deluxe with shrimp,lettuce,tomato,onion,and mayo supposed to be?

[PaulaInLove]

paula, i have a question.

i am in love with my best friend. we are both girls, 19. i am gay, she is not, what should i do?

Hey Prez,

sorry, that your stuck in this typical dilemma. As always I do need a lil further information to come up with a strategy.

First of all (and, yes, I'm gonna quote this again and again): most girls are straight until they're not. So don't dare to give up hope.
Did you tell her that you're in love with her?
I'm assuming you don't wanna lose her as a friend, either, huh?
Is she in a relationship? And what is her general opinion about homosexuality?
And most importantly, does she know you're gay?

What I would do:
In case she doesn't know your gay: tell her. If you don't know how, ask away and we will come up with ideas on letting her in on your lil secret.
If she does know (already or after she adjusted to it), you could start joking around about how she's cute and your dreamgirl. But be really sarcastic about it. You need to make her wonder whether you are saying the truth or just making fun of her. If she says stuff like: "I wish I had a boyfriend who would give me massages everyday." (just an example..it can be anything of that kind), you could go: "I'll give you one and you don't even have to bring me beer or clean up my stinky socks."
She has to feel comfortable around you and she gradually has to learn that she can take advantage of you being gay. Don't mention it too often, though, that might annoy her.
Once she adjusted to it and knows that you're kinda interested and feels comfortable around you, she might give it a try...don't try asking her about her sexual orientation...or force a decision out of her. If she's interested at all she prolly never thought about it before and needs time to get used to the idea.

As I said, with more information I could try to find more specific things for you to do.

Good Luck and keep me updated :-).
Cheers.

[PaulaInLove]

Hi Paula!
I have a question as well.
SOMEBODY is not answering a question I was asking, so maybe you can help me with it. :) Here it goes:
@ PaulaInLove: Ok off-topic now....sorry.
Just wanted to ask Paula something.
In your signature it says: "When life hands you lemons, ask for tequila and salt."
Did Ellen say that or where did you get that from?? I really like it.
Thought about a translation in german, but I couldn´t come up with anything that really fits. How would you translate it??

greets scully4ever

scully4ever[/b]

Sorry Baby, I must've totally missed the question. I hope you can forgive me.

I have this from another member 'climb'. She hasn't been around in a loong loong time but I'm still grateful for the quote.
I'll try to think up a German translation, but I don't like translating stuff into German in general. It always sounds fake and 'holprig' in a way :-). I'll give it a shot, though. Gotta go eat lunch.
Cheers...

[PaulaInLove]

3. Paula is always right
3.1 Whenever in doubt ask lostioz
4

…to be continued


last step to join our conversation: we need your age, relationship status and a pic, please feel free to pm Paula or me

Why is this not Rule #1?

Genelee, where's the pic? :-D I've been checking my pm-box every day but you seem to be in doubt as to whether you should take the risk. We're nice once you get to know us...I promise! :lol:

[mamacan]

Ahem.....Paula, I am reminding you that the tequila and salt line came from me, not from climb. Tsk tsk tsk! Keep up the good work here in the therapy corner....I enjoy your solutions! :P

[lostioz]

1. Paula is always right
2. Whenever in doubt ask lostioz
3. When still in doubt ask Moe
4. It’s all about irony
5. Our humour is just another defence against this crazy forum-always remember that
6. No one is interested in your real sex stories (see rule 4)

genelee don’t be afraid, we’ve seen worse pictures in life. I say take the risk, you won’t regret it

[PaulaInLove]

Ahem.....Paula, I am reminding you that the tequila and salt line came from me, not from climb. Tsk tsk tsk! Keep up the good work here in the therapy corner....I enjoy your solutions! :P

Maybe climb got it from you?! Cuz I remember her pm'ing it to me one time. So I couldn't have confused the two of you. I will give credit to you in all future references, tho. And Losti, please take out the words in brackets in Rule #1...it bugs me :-D.

[debby]

hi paula,

the last time i was posting here, i was just happy to finally know who i am, and still i´m pround to be 8-)
but things change and i just have my first realy bad crush on a girl. i´m going crazy couse (as in so many storys) i feel madly in love with my best friend :(
it´s realy hard to deal with it, i think that she knows that i love her, but she´s not gay. that´s what she thinks, but in my opinion she is. so many people we both know and saw us in the past weeks where asking my if we where a couple...
she´s more than just nice and freindly to me, but i just can´t talk with her about it.
the next problem is, that she lives 470 km away from me but we see each other once a month in the past year, but this year will be different. couse i plan to go to LA and she wants to work for 3 month in Ghana, so we both have no time. :(
i would do mostly everything for her, but i kind of know that there is no near future for us.

so know my question or problem...

i really love her and i don´t know how to deal with it, should i try to just move on and find another love? or should i give her more time to discover her true self?

[climb]

Ahem.....Paula, I am reminding you that the tequila and salt line came from me, not from climb. Tsk tsk tsk! Keep up the good work here in the therapy corner....I enjoy your solutions! :P

Maybe climb got it from you?! Cuz I remember her pm'ing it to me one time. So I couldn't have confused the two of you. I will give credit to you in all future references, tho. And Losti, please take out the words in brackets in Rule #1...it bugs me :-D.

Yeah, it was for sure not from me. I'm not that smart. :P It is a darn good quote though, and a great way to think when things go wrong.

I'll try to come up with a good quote later that you can use and then you can say it came from mamacan so we'll all be even. :)

[treiner]

Yeah, I remember that day, when Paula asked mamacan if she could borrow that quote. Ahh, those were the good old days, huh? Anyway...my love to all...I miss you gals, and the fun we had. I still look in to see what's happening, from time to time. Too bad we were too dodgy for this site, and wow! Doesnt seem like we were trying to run up our post count now, does it? LOL Anyway, my best to everyone here. I love you.

Hey, knirke! 8)

[genelee16]

Genelee, where's the pic? :-D I've been checking my pm-box every day but you seem to be in doubt as to whether you should take the risk. We're nice once you get to know us...I promise!

i'm actually kind of afraid you guys might swallow me alive.
oh well, i'm kidding. i'm not in doubt but am procrastinating.

@ paula, check your pm. If it doesn't satisfy you, i'll find another. 8-) [/quote]

[PaulaInLove]

Hey Guys,

thanks for the pic, Gen. Sorry I haven't been on here in a while...I'm still in straight-land and can't really get on the computer much.

Losti - how ya been honey? How is the first day back at school?

I'll be home in two days and will give your dilemma a try Debby, sorry about that.

Oh and my apologies to you mamacan, my brain must've done that on purpose...it tries to make my life as hard as it can.

[moefish]

Hey popper, hope you're having fun... I saw a rodeo on tv last night and thought of you.. have a safe trip home :)

Ps did u get the vans???

[lostioz]

good to hear from you, the first day back in gay town was good, but the city seems so quiet since you been gone. Have you already met nice cowgirls? I’ll keep an eye on debby but she still doesn’t want to go out with me. enjoy your last day :)

[debby]

(...)I'll be home in two days and will give your dilemma a try Debby, sorry about that. (...)


that would be nice, i still couldn´t tell her what i feel and it´s driving me crazy...

I’ll keep an eye on debby but she still doesn’t want to go out with me.

:cool: sorry right now i´m just blind for signals like that, i just though you want a pic?! :P but i never say never...

[lostioz]

:cool: sorry right now i´m just blind for signals like that, i just though you want a pic?! :P but i never say never...
What did you think the roses were for? ;-)

[DJH]

Hi paula, I think its cool that ur doing this, just thought id tell you!!!

[Stevearino]

Don't ask her questions about meat products and scales,though! 8O 8O 8O 8O

[lostioz]

Don't ask her questions about meat products and scales,though! 8O 8O 8O 8O
http://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/midi/konfus/a014.gif I don't know what's going on in your mind but Paula would love to talk about meat, she's the biggest eater I know

[Stevearino]

I don't know what's going on in your mind but Paula would love to talk about meat, she's the biggest eater I know

Do you have personal experience with her,and hopefully a videotape you could share with the rest of the class here???http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/liebe/d025.gif

[lostioz]

Do you have personal experience with her,and hopefully a videotape you could share with the rest of the class here???
don't even try to make these kinda jokes http://www.cheesebuerger.de/images/midi/frech/d010.gif

[Stevearino]

Weren't you the one that posted this in the newbie greetings awhile back?...http://www.cosgan.de/images/smilie/boese/p030.gif

[genelee16]

you german chicks are fun!

[debby]

you german chicks are fun!

thx :cool: and i know, we rock!

[Stevearino]

And good card players too!

[genelee16]

strip pooker? i would love to see that!

[lostioz]

better not genelee, you would get jealous

[Talula]

Hmm...smells like the gutter in here... :D Hey everyone! Or maybe I should say everyone, who still remembers me ;) I know it's been ages since I last poked my head in here, and what better place to reacquaint myself with the forum than Paula's Therapy Corner! I'm afraid I dont have any interesting questions for you, luv, except the obvious how are my gutter girls? Paula, Reebi, St17ar, mamacan, climb, and the ones that are slipping my mind right now - how are you all doing? I don't need to ask about treiner, she's still pestering me! :P Nah, I love it. But I miss hearing about you guys!

I am working on an exam right now (yep...still at uni, slowly making my way toward my master's), so there's not much interesting stuff going on for me at the mo. However, in February I start an internship as producer assistant for a very cool film company over here. It's going to be hard work, but I can't wait to get started.

Ok, just wanted to touch base with you guys. Take care and be good :lol:

[angelica]

8O
Dear Paula/and or any one with an opinion :),

I am not one to spill my guts, ask for favors, nor ask for advice but here
goes. I have posted about the amazing discovery of "true love" with my soulmate. After a rediculously horrendous, and lengthy marriage and a
lifetime of thinking only of myself as heterosexual, and an ugly divorce,
I find myself in love with my bestfriend/ soulmate.

I am troubled however, that despite the fact that we are so connected and in tune with each other, she seems to not want to 'publically' acknowledge our closeness in the one social circle we both frequent online, as we are in a LDR.

She is incredibly supportive, loving, and wonderful in EVERY other way
BUT this is MESSING WITH MY head, but she thinks I am being
rediculous.

What do you think????

8O

Having read the other thread, maybe its time to slow down abit, maybe she is not ready to go public, why push her out of her comfort zone before she is ready? Maybe she wants to take it slower. In my opinion you are both in this relationship, you need to talk and respect each others reasons for going public, staying within the boundaries you agree too. If my partner pushed me aorund in my comfort zone to do something I wasn't comfortable with I wouldn't be happy, which would make her unhappy, that goes both ways in our relationship and sometimes this happens, we talk, and comprimise, time not only heals but allows people to move forward, being pushed won't help. Thats just my opinion which may differ greatly from others here.

[petal]

I agree wholeheartedly with Jaded. It's a two-way relationship and it has to be a compromise between both of you to make sure you respect each others wishes/needs and keep nurturing each other. Life is hard enough and some of us need more time to get accustomed to our new found feelings and opening up to public scrutiny.

[angelica]

Thank you so much for your reply and advice, it was thoughtful for you to
think about this situation and get back to me and I really appreciate it so much. Your advice makes so much sense and I truly do not want to give her a sense that I am pushing for more public acknowledement of what we
are/have. I guess I feel like I am getting mixed messages about what
she wants and how commited she is to us.

I know how important family/friends are and I respect that. But when one finally finds the love of there life, one would think, especially after pledging yourselves to each other that yous would be making new traditions and carving out a space for each other especially at the Holidays.

We have a pact though that no one in our circles can ever find out the
true nature of what we are to each other, and because of that we
wind up in situations where it doesn't make sense to those in her
circles why she would need to include/make special calls etc
to me if we are "just friends", and in order not to rock the boat
especially with her I gathered that she felt it would step on toes if she would have excused herself for a bit and went to the phone and opened my gift briefly/shared a moment with me.
I guess she felt that here planned trip here after the Holidays was our Christmas am I being stupid/selfish?

She had mentioned a few times in the fall about about my return visits and I remember her specifially mentioning
my being there for her Fathers Birthday and how it would be great. (All of a sudden, her brother is planning a Huge Family Reunion/Birthday batch for her Father and has sent out save the date invitations for the date. When I heard of the party I casually said how wonderful would be for her Dad and was told that she had not asked her brother if they were going to be inviting friends. It sounded as if she was going to leave it up to her brother, If her brother invited a good friend of his or not) as to whether I could be invited or not.)

At this pojnt I don't even want to go anymore!
I mean, I even brought up in conversation that I had read recently that some people have casual relationships (friends with benefits) where
they are both on the same page (less hurt this way) and there aren't
unrealistic expectations. But she swears that we are spouses in
every way except for "marriage".

I guess what I wonder about is, and I admit I am being dense about
all of this as I am so head over heels - how can someone who
is supposed to be your life partner, just expect for you to "understand"
that at times they are going to have to basically abandon you/your
relationship when its inconvenient/or might ruffle feathers and to
cover up any hint of what you's are to each other and not expect that to
hurt or damage the FABRIC of your relationship.

I hate to have these issues constantly warring with the otherwise
incredible thing we have going.

HELP!!!!

PS: Maybe at the root of our issue is that this is the first relationship with the same sex for bith of us, neither of us has come out and I guess we
don't intend to, yet I feel that "expectations" of how a couple should
be meeting each others needs yet the need to keep it "under wraps"
is messing with how it feels as, once the holidays were behind us.
And I was TRYING to put that all behind us and now THIS.
I am seeing red flags, and at the same time all she talks about
is our future together and I'm like ?!?!?!

I guess what I am wondering is
How can a person look for a future with someone and
try and potentially relocate to be with them if there are
such mixed messages and red flags.

Maybe its time you two actually got sorted to spend a day together, if its possible and thrashed out once and for all what it is you both want, see if compromises and some sort of understanding can be met? If not then take a step back and time out to decide if you want this going on onad on and on.......

[petal]

We have a pact though that no one in our circles can ever find out the
true nature of what we are to each other............
.....Maybe at the root of our issue is that this is the first relationship with the same sex for bith of us, neither of us has come out and I guess we
don't intend to

I think that a lot of the "answers" lay in what you have said in your last post - a new all consuming love that you have discovered is difficult to contain & especially when it's continually trying to "evolve" in a closeted situation you'll always be banging your heads against a brick wall. Maybe your girlfriend is able to cope with it better than you in an emotional sense?????

You do need to get together and discuss these issues & give each other full consideration for the "boundaries" you wish to have within your newfound (& overwhelming) relationship, but ensure that there's respect for each others needs.

I hope I can be the first to wish you both a Happy Valentine's Day :inlove:

[angelica]

Jaded and Petal: Your advice and insight were deeply appreciated and I
just wanted to let you know that.
Relationships can be so challenging at times, but are sometimes
even more so when one must manage such a deep connection
that is and may remain closeted.
My SO and I talked and seem to be making a bit of progress ;)

A

PS: Happy Valentine's Day to you as well!

[petal]

My SO and I talked and seem to be making a bit of progress ;)

That's music to my ears Angelica!!! Just being totally open & honest in expressing your wants & needs can make all the difference. Well done! :)

[angelica]

Petal: I agree completely that being honest and open about your wants and needs and being utterly respectful for your SO's as well is imperitive
in an unconditional and reciprical relationship.
I had promised myself at the end of my horrible marriage/and during my
horrendous divorce that I would never be in a relationship again.
Well , ya know what they say..........NEVER say never..........

BUt I must say I have no regrets, as getting to know and meeting/falling
head over bum for my SO has been the best thing EVER!

Yet I must be frank that once you have been burned in relationships,
and there are walls there, and one is fragile somehow,
to be 100% vulnerable in every way to whatever will and
can happen can be challenging.

My SO says sometimes that once in a while I seem to "look for red flags"
and I should just open my heart completely and I want to so much .
Yet, I think part of me wants to just go with it and enjoy every day
to the fullest with her in my life.

What we share is so incredible! We seem to share everything usually,
eventually, we can't help ourselves. And the passion, well its fantastic.
SO I guess overall, I have so much to celebrate!

Thank you for listening! And if you ever need an ear..I'm a great listener!

PS: I guess I just kept hoping she would change her mind about
getting married. What is it about that ceremony/event that seems
to be such a sticking point at times for so many?

[petal]

BUt I must say I have no regrets, as getting to know and meeting/falling
head over bum for my SO has been the best thing EVER!

........I think part of me wants to just go with it and enjoy every day
to the fullest with her in my life.

What we share is so incredible! We seem to share everything usually,
eventually, we can't help ourselves. And the passion, well its fantastic.
SO I guess overall, I have so much to celebrate!

PS: I guess I just kept hoping she would change her mind about
getting married. What is it about that ceremony/event that seems
to be such a sticking point at times for so many?

Just reading these specific parts of your post is very joyful - particularly this Valentine's "week" (why just one day..."am i right ladies"?), but there's no rush for a marriage.......just enjoy & love each other. You have now what so many others can only dream about!

Just reading these specific parts of your post is very joyful - particularly this Valentine's "week" (why just one day..."am i right ladies"?), but there's no rush for a marriage.......just enjoy & love each other. You have now what so many others can only dream about!

:D Well said Petal.

[angelica]

Thank you Petal and Jaded for your enthusiasm and support.
I must confess that I know next to ...well absolutely
nothing ..pracically about same sex relationships.

I mean do (?most )lesbian couples eventually get married/have a commitment ceromony. Or do most not bother and just do what feels right for them?
I mean if one thought of relationships their whole lives. (heterosexually..
the natural progression, usually andeventually leads the couple down the aisle).
Do people supremely contented in a same sex relationship usually
wrestle quite a bit about this or am I just blowing it all out of
proportion?

Just wondering what you(s) thought..

just do what feels right for them?

Exactly!!! Each and every one of us are different and what suits some doesn't necessarily suit another, couple that is. For some the Civil Union it suits, for others it doesn't, sadly in some countries even when the couple have a CU its not recognised. But for the couple it means a lot, if that is what they choose.

[angelica]

just do what feels right for them?

Exactly!!! Each and every one of us are different and what suits some doesn't necessarily suit another, couple that is. For some the Civil Union it suits, for others it doesn't, sadly in some countries even when the couple have a CU its not recognised. But for the couple it means a lot, if that is what they choose.

I have gone in circles in my head about this one.
And have come to the conclusion that I must let this one go for now,
and be open to the possibility if it should come up again in the future.
I think it is horrendous and incredibly sad that society does not allow/accept the sanctity of a same sex union.

[petal]

...have come to the conclusion that I must let this one go for now, and be open to the possibility if it should come up again in the future. I think it is horrendous and incredibly sad that society does not allow/accept the sanctity of a same sex union.

Right on!!!!!! I'm hoping/dreaming of a time I can walk my girl down the aisle and have the same joys/rights/life of male/female couples. Marriage is a tough one and is up to the individuals to decide - there's no rush when you have THE one by your side already!!!

:D Go with what is right for you, thats what we intend to do, my partner and I, hang society and what they think, mind tho we both live in countires where same sex CU's are just another way of life.

You will Petal, you will, meet that day both you and Kristy. As I am sure you will too Angelica, and any others reading this that seek it.

[angelica]

As a person who had always enjoyed all the rights/priveledges of being
heterosexual in the past, I must confess I took it all for granted, and though I did think it was awful and would put my vote/voice as being
for the right for same sex unions in our society, I never really had it hit home. I think that that is true for so many. And because of that, it
must make it "easy " for hypocritical and narrowminded people to cheat others out of such an important thing.

I truly hope that we all will be able to move past this issue,
and not let it negatively impact our miraculous relationships.

[Black_Lady]

Hm..
My problem is..
She is shy,silly,a babygirl but sexy (=
everyone wants to be with us,flirt with us..
but i can see she wants me too, we didnt say anytin like "i love u" but we're flirtin anyway...I touch her gentle and guess she addicted that =)
so, i wanna ask; how can i say that "i love u!"? It is too excited for me to say ..

[Love9408]

I would just mke it natural, you don't want it to be wierd or anything. When your like looking into her eyes or just being quite take her hand and with all your heart tell her you love her. Thats the way my baby did it and i cried, lol becuase i didn't have the courage to do it myself. :D

[Black_Lady]

oh, that's vey romantic; maybe i can do it same way and she'll like it too

[Love9408]

Tell me how things work out!!! Good Luck :D

[Black_Lady]

OK it wasnt romantic,
we re fightin all the time(for 2 days) without any serious reason!
today, we were in school, she was listenin the teacher, i wrote a note and asked "would you go on a date with me?" and " oh, it's too hard to ask" and guess what she said! She said "no!" .
no!
a simple no! u cant kno how it hurts! after school ended, i went out and started to cry in streets..Now, i dont believe in anythin, and i dont wanna see her, or think about it.And i dont think that i can talk to her again, i'll runaway from this love(or should i call it lie?!)
that's the end.Very happy, huh? 8O

[Elise]

OK it wasnt romantic,
we re fightin all the time(for 2 days) without any serious reason!
today, we were in school, she was listenin the teacher, i wrote a note and asked "would you go on a date with me?" and " oh, it's too hard to ask" and guess what she said! She said "no!" .
no!
a simple no! u cant kno how it hurts! after school ended, i went out and started to cry in streets..Now, i dont believe in anythin, and i dont wanna see her, or think about it.And i dont think that i can talk to her again, i'll runaway from this love(or should i call it lie?!)
that's the end.Very happy, huh? 8O
Maybe she just did it because some girls like to flirt with lesbians while they aren't gay... Does everyone know that you are a lesbian?

[Black_Lady]

one of my best friends knows it, but i m bisexuel.
Actually i dont understand anythin, she wanted me to say that, but then she changed her mind :S
actually i m guilty too, cuz i m datin with her best friend(not seriously but enough to be jealous)and by the way i have a boyfriend too.
Whatever, i m gonna crazy!

[Elise]

one of my best friends knows it, but i m bisexuel.
Actually i dont understand anythin, she wanted me to say that, but then she changed her mind :S
actually i m guilty too, cuz i m datin with her best friend(not seriously but enough to be jealous)and by the way i have a boyfriend too.
Whatever, i m gonna crazy!

Oki :( lool i don't understand it so in 1 hour you have a bf and you totally fergot the other girl... let's say... COOOL!!! :cool:

[Black_Lady]

i guess i drove her crazy,she must be jealous, of course!
oh, i cant look at her face anymore, i m ashamed! ff.. :x
after i confessed her, and spoiled there, i actin like it s a joke and she wanted to believe me , i guess

[Elise]

i guess i drove her crazy,she must be jealous, of course!
oh, i cant look at her face anymore, i m ashamed! ff.. :x
after i confessed her, and spoiled there, i actin like it s a joke and she wanted to believe me , i guess
Well about who are you talking now? the gf or your friend? I think she souldn't be jealous if it's just a friend...

[Black_Lady]

actually thats complicated.
her best friend and I are like lovers,but we arnt .
Upps, but i said her that we're on a date with her bestfriend and she wasnt suprised,she just said: "Oh, it was clear,no doubt you're on a date!"
man, she's mad ha?