The Invisable FED Handbook

[Humanafterall]

Don't worry no one is getting arrested......yet. FED stands for Fans of Ellen Degeneres.

The other day, I was reading the invisible FED Handbook...I call it invisible because the Handbook doesn't really exist. The following is what I like to call, literary sarcasism....Shhhh... tell no one. http://www.ellen-forum.de/board/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif

As I was reading it (cover for cover--mind you) I noticed an interesting guideline on page 687, third paragraph, point b.

It states: All Fans of Ellen Degeneres after the age of 15 months MUST HAVE at least two teeth. This does not include CHICKLETS. Teeth must remain in mouth for at least one hour during the day.

C. No body is discriminated from being an Ellen Degeneres fan. That's right....A fan can be any color. Red, blue, green, purple, pink, tan , white or orange. Except for Grey people. Grey people are discriminated against for medical purposes. Grey people must be taken immediately to the hospital because their funny bone is usually broken.
The usual medical treatment for a broken funny bone. Two cookies and a glass of milk.

[Tolaoi]

Don't worry no one is getting arrested......yet. FED stands for Fans of Ellen Degeneres.

The other day, I was reading the invisible FED Handbook...I call it invisible because the Handbook doesn't really exist. The following is what I like to call, literary sarcasism....Shhhh... tell no one. http://www.ellen-forum.de/board/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif

As I was reading it (cover for cover--mind you) I noticed an interesting guideline on page 687, third paragraph, point b.

It states: All Fans of Ellen Degeneres after the age of 15 months MUST HAVE at least two teeth. This does not include CHICKLETS. Teeth must remain in mouth for at least one hour during the day.

C. No body is discriminated from being an Ellen Degeneres fan. That's right....A fan can be any color. Red, blue, green, purple, pink, tan , white or orange. Except for Grey people. Grey people are discriminated against for medical purposes. Grey people must be taken immediately to the hospital because their funny bone is usually broken.
The usual medical treatment for a broken funny bone. Two cookies and a glass of milk.

:D:xmas_2::d_biglaugh::d_laugh::d_cute: so funny

[misskitty]

Don't worry no one is getting arrested......yet. FED stands for Fans of Ellen Degeneres.

The other day, I was reading the invisible FED Handbook...I call it invisible because the Handbook doesn't really exist. The following is what I like to call, literary sarcasism....Shhhh... tell no one. http://www.ellen-forum.de/board/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif

As I was reading it (cover for cover--mind you) I noticed an interesting guideline on page 687, third paragraph, point b.

It states: All Fans of Ellen Degeneres after the age of 15 months MUST HAVE at least two teeth. This does not include CHICKLETS. Teeth must remain in mouth for at least one hour during the day.

C. No body is discriminated from being an Ellen Degeneres fan. That's right....A fan can be any color. Red, blue, green, purple, pink, tan , white or orange. Except for Grey people. Grey people are discriminated against for medical purposes. Grey people must be taken immediately to the hospital because their funny bone is usually broken.
The usual medical treatment for a broken funny bone. Two cookies and a glass of milk.

yes that is very hilarious thanks for sharing that :xmas_4: :d_laugh:

[HighAsAKite]

Agree thanks for sharing Kate too funny :d_twitcy::xmas_15::hammer:


The usual medical treatment for a broken funny bone. Two cookies and a glass of milk.

[AnastasiaBeavrhausen]

Kate, you freaking crack me up!:xmas_14: (What if I am a teal color?);)

[LadyDeath91]

Oh Kate youre so hilarious ! :xmas_9: And cute too ;)
thanks for sharing that lmao

[i_love_ellen]

LMAO bahahaha i love it kate! you are so funny :D:d_biglaugh::d_laugh::mad_laugh:

[vanblue2003]

that was great! :D

[Humanafterall]

Thank you. :xmas_19:

Here is a holiday song I wrote for us FED


Twelve Days of Christmas according to the Fans of Ellen Degeneres

On the first day of the holidays a true FED wished for an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the second day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the third day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Three decks of playing cards, two Ellen books, and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the fourth day of holidays a true FED wished for. Four iPhones, three deck of cards, two Ellen books, and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the fifth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Five ‘Team Ellen’ hood-ies, four iPhones, three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the six day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the seventh day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Seven pairs of Ellen undies, six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the eighth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the ninth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Nine TEDS watches, eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the tenth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the eleventh day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Eleven wide screen TV’s, Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, Eight pairs of converse sneakers, Seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the twelfth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Twelve hugs and kisses, Eleven wide screen TV’s Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, Eight pairs of converse sneakers, Seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

[misskitty]

i like that alot human that is really cute :xmas_4:

[HeavensAngel332]

Thank you. :xmas_19:

Here is a holiday song I wrote for us FED


Twelve Days of Christmas according to the Fans of Ellen Degeneres

On the first day of the holidays a true FED wished for an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the second day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the third day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Three decks of playing cards, two Ellen books, and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the fourth day of holidays a true FED wished for. Four iPhones, three deck of cards, two Ellen books, and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the fifth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Five ‘Team Ellen’ hood-ies, four iPhones, three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the six day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the seventh day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Seven pairs of Ellen undies, six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the eighth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the ninth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Nine TEDS watches, eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the tenth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, eight pairs of converse sneakers, seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the eleventh day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Eleven wide screen TV’s, Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, Eight pairs of converse sneakers, Seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

On the twelfth day of the holidays a true FED wished for. Twelve hugs and kisses, Eleven wide screen TV’s Ten laptop computers, Nine TEDS watches, Eight pairs of converse sneakers, Seven pairs of Ellen undies, .six MP3’s, five hoodies, four iPhones. Three decks of cards, two Ellen books and an Ellen Degeneres DVD

lol, awesome song! I was actually singing it out loud :D My mom thinks I'm crazy! :rolleyes: