Alex feels too old to...

[Degrossi]

I found this blog entry she wrote over at ourchart.com

http://www.ourchart.com/content/phone-sex-american-dream

[coffee_lover]

I thought Alex gave a rather deep answer to a complex question. She tried to address the dicotomy in the gay/lesbian community between those who desire a more traditional relationship with marriage and those who do not. There are the same 2 sides in the straight community, I suspect, I just don't see it as clearly.

The problem is that those who are gay and lesbian who want the more traditional setup with marriage don't have that choice and so end up restricted in their relationships and never know whether they would have made it long term if they could have gotten married.

I disagree that she is too old for a lasting relationship. People never are.

[zoeak]

Thanks for the link, an interesting read! She makes several good points...

[misskitty]

I found this blog entry she wrote over at ourchart.com

http://www.ourchart.com/content/phone-sex-american-dream

thanks for the blog link i found it to be very interesting

[genelee16]

i would think that she still can't get over ellen, who can?:rolleyes:

[jlilest]

Perhaps she has had a hard time finding a relationship that lasted.

It sounds like she has had more than one that she thought would last that didn't.

I hope she does find someone. She seems like a very nice person.

[Humanafterall]

n response to Melissa Ferrick's Phone Sex (http://www.ourchart.com/content/phone-sex-the-one)question; “Do you think the constraints that the American Dream (i.e., find ONE life partner/get married/have kids) puts on our culture has influenced the way queers view and approach relationships and “true love"? Like taking the institution of marriage, for instance — it seems to me that queer women and men may have double the amount of relationships in their life than straight women and men do. I wonder what that has to do (if anything) with marriage rights?”]

This is a very interesting question. Alex answered it honestly, openly, wisely and with humor (at the end) .

IN MY OPINION, I think the "American dream" in some capacity has changed in some years. While it may be true the "traditional American dream" (have partner/marriage/kids) is a very worthy goal for many couples. To simply "imply" that the "American dream" ONLY to obtain those three goals and labeling it "true love" is kind of insulting. American Dream: Partner (check) Marriage (check) 2.5 kids (check)= American dream/happiness.

I don't think EVERYONE or EVERY couple's goal is to be like everyone else. Just because...it's the "American dream." They have to do what is right for the relationship. If that "presents" itself as the "traditional" (partner/marriage/kids) then so be it....but if it doesn't that's okay too.

In this day in age (especially sense 'Ellen's coming out' episode) I'd like to think that the American dream WILL slowly "morph" itself into a dream of (pride/self-acceptance/compassion). Pride being proud of your accomplishments no matter what. Self-acceptance meaning accepting who you are, not what you are. Compassion helping others regardless of needing an award. This is what I pray the Dream will morph itself into.

On a more intellectual level; I do think that each of us has our "own dream" at to which to live to strive for. It's the finding another person that shares parts of the same dream is the tricky part, for any relationship. BUT to deny the rights of any couple who are in a committed relationship, needs to change. Perhaps that is ONE of the reasons why so many couples strive for "American Dream".
Sure it may be "just a piece of paper" to one couple...but to another couple it may mean

LIFE, LIBERITY, AND EQUALITY

Who doesn't deserve that?