Coming Out Story

[tehSandra]

Let's share our coming out stories! I'm sure that'll be interesting.

Unfortunately, I don't have a real coming out story. My mother just told me one day, over lunch, that she "knows" about me and my (now ex) gf. I chocked on my food, nodded, she told me she still loves me, and we never spoke of it again. :blink: Well, she brought up like 2 times that I can't tell my grandma's ("they wouldn't understand") and that's it. I don't know if my dad or sister know, and I don't intend on ever asking them! The end.

What about you guys?

[taliootz]

hmmm well my coming out was somewhat unexpected.

My girlfriend had placed an ad in the paper for my Mum's 1 year anniversary and both my brother and Dad wanted to know who she was since they know my friends and figured it wasnt a friend. I tried to avoid it and not talk about it but then my Dad and i were talking and we got onto the topic of gay's and he asked me what i thought about it and i said "Well im gay so..." and he said "I know" which surprised me. We talked about it for a few hours and he seemed really supportive and understanding, telling me as long as im happy he's happy.

My brother came in on the a** end of the convo and said that he has also known for a long time, apparently my dress sense, interests and behaviour gave it away.

So at first i felt quite relieved naturally that i had lifted the huge burden i had been carrying for such a long time. But over the last month things have become increasingly difficult for me.

My brother has been making things very hard for me. He doesnt want my gf staying over or coming around regularly and he feels the need to tell me how ridiculous i am if i see her a few days in a row or talk to her on the phone every night. He keeps rolling his eyes and making smart comments both so that she can hear it and me obviously. I've tried to talk to him about it and ask why it bothers him so much because im trying very hard to make sure i dont make either of them uncomfortable....I am not affectionate with my gf in front of them so they dont have to deal with that. We keep out of my brothers way, we are always in my room so they rarely cross paths...yet he still has a problem.

When im saying goodbye to my gf at her car, the idiots linger around the front door so they can see if im doing anything with her. I have no privacy and i feel like im under a microscope all the time. They are trying to maintain the control over me that they think they are entitled to i guess, but i can tell you it makes things really awkward for me and my gf.


So i asked my bro yesterday if he could please stop with the smart comments and attitude and what it is about me being gay thats so difficult for him to understand, and we ended up discussing the whole what makes someone gay thing and then the truth came out. He believes being gay is a choice, that you arent born that way, that i hate men which is why i choose to be with women. He tried to throw the whole...you show me a blood test showing that there are different hormone levels between heteros and gays and then he'll believe there's a physiological reason for it. It's not natural cos men are supposed to be with women, otherwise there'd be no population yada yada yada. I said that i couldnt care less why im this way...as it could be attributed to several different experiences i had as a child, but either way i am the way i am and it shouldnt affect him. He should want me to be happy.

I wish now that i hadnt told either of them because even though it was difficult being closeted...i would have that any day over how i am being treated now and the discomfort i am feeling around my brother especially and when i have my gf around.

Anyhow that was my coming out. I dont even want to think about the rest of the family...sheesh that'll be fun!! NOT

Talz:blink:

[irock4u]

Coming out you will learn is like a never ending thing. There is coming out to yourself then comes the family and friends then comes the new friends you will meet in the future and maybe sometimes work now we are getting domestic partnership coverage in many states.

Me...I knew i was gay for most of my life from an early age but did not fully admit until i kissed a girl at 24. never looked back:D

Family, in 2003 finally came out to my brother who always assumed and told me he will always love me no matter what. so, i finally tell him since i had found my love and was settling down for life (didnt last:() anyways he has not spoken to me since when he said he assumed and loved me. found out he told my sister and my sister told my dad. and i dont know who else knows gossip spreads like wild fire in families.

Friends, very selective on the friends i tell; very selective on friends in general anyways. i mainly only make gay friends anyways i guess so i dont have to explain to straight folks why i am gay and all that mess. when i 1st came out to my straight friends one wanted me to kiss her:rolleyes: to see if she was gay:wacko: girl was pretty i should have kissed her. but my naive butt told her if she didnt already have the thoughts of kissing and making love to a woman then she wasnt gay. sorry got distracted:p

[petal]

hmmm well my coming out was somewhat unexpected...........So at first i felt quite relieved naturally that i had lifted the huge burden i had been carrying for such a long time. But over the last month things have become increasingly difficult for me.............My brother has been making things very hard for me.................When im saying goodbye to my gf at her car, the idiots linger around the front door so they can see if im doing anything with her. I have no privacy and i feel like im under a microscope all the time. They are trying to maintain the control over me that they think they are entitled to i guess, but i can tell you it makes things really awkward for me and my gf..........I wish now that i hadnt told either of them because even though it was difficult being closeted...i would have that any day over how i am being treated now and the discomfort i am feeling around my brother especially and when i have my gf around.

Anyhow that was my coming out. I dont even want to think about the rest of the family...sheesh that'll be fun!! NOT

Talz:blink:

Hi there BD. Nice to see you up & about again ;)

You've come such a long way in a short time. I'm so happy for you.

Be proud of finally finding your true self & having a steady relationship. It will take a while for your bro to adjust.......but he will.

:thumbup:

[Ronja]

I really like this thread! Keep it coming!


My coming out was no big deal at all. The biggest part of it was the relief I felt telling it myself and telling it others. I never for once was scared or whatever. If somebody has problems...then he/she should keep them.

My parents took it quite well. My mother more than my father. He took some more time but now everybody knows and everybody knows my girlfriend. It's no topic at all anymore.

Oh, I had my coming out around Easter 2006.

[kaaaaaaaaka]

my comming out story...is pretty recent! i came out to my mom about a month ago, well not actually came out to her. long story short : i had a bf for a little while(why? dont ask me...i guess confusion:confused: lol) and when i broke up with him my mom was asking me questions like "why did u break up?" and stuff like that cuz i wasnt giving any explanation to my decision so...anyways, she said "is there someone else? maybe a woman?" and my reaction gave it away! i became all red and tears started comming down so she kinda fished it out of me lol But im glad she did!:)

and i told my sister on monday!! we were at a party and i dont really remember how it came up but i told her!

i was expecting both of them to say something like "i had doubts" or "i knew u were gay" but they both said that they had no idea!(that sucks cuz it means i dont look gay...not that i want to "look gay" but it would be easier to meet someone cuz im pretty shy...wathever) but they have been amasing!!:):) they both support me and love me and have absolutely no problem with it so...:)

thats my comming out story so far!! and i agree its a great thread!!!:)

[mindless]

hey folks,

(:

mhh yeah where I should start.. I had my coming out just two weeks ago.. the hardest part was to speak with my best friend ana.. I told her

I gone abroad this spring to ireland... and a lot of things in my life had changed.

certainly I already had a 'relationship' with a girl few years ago.. after that I had a relationship with a boy.. for 3 1/2 until last year..

but yeah I met a girl at january on a chat.. since 2 month we had chat a lot and I'd never expect that we will met us in real life one day... but in 2 weeks when I'm on vacation I will drive to her (I'm just totaly felt in love *-*)

Because I never had a coming out in front of my fam and friends I deceided to do it before drive to her.. because I know what I want.. and I really hate it .. if someone use a 'relationship' for a coming out...

so know I will try it and hope that there is a happy end and if not it's ok (:

Because I'm proud for what I am and it's the first time that I can look into a mirror without any doubt's.

the hardest part at my outing was to talk with my best friend ana.. I told her that I will met someone.. then she asked me who and I said 'yeah here is a pic' then she was very happy because of the fact that I will met a girl. This whole conversation was so cool and funny. On the same evening I wrote a long post on my blog and send that to all my friends and to my family..

So there you have my story (and sorry for my bad grammer and so on.. >.>)

cheers from dublin
jesse

[amccrazgrl]

I used to watch Ellen the sitcom and love it. I didn't have any clue until she came out on 4-30-97 the day after my birthday. That is when I found out the word gay. So everyone started dating in high school and I just went online to lesbian chat rooms. My first thoughts were hey at least I can't get pregnat and maybe I'm bi. So I talked to guys and girls but never had a bf. I began talking to this girl a few years older than me and she kept telling me she knows deep down I'm a lesbian. I admited it to myself offical when I was 18 in 2001.

Coming out.....I met my 1st gf in Aug of 01 and we started going out on 9-11-01 (ya I hate that day now reminds me of her). She moved in with my mom and I while mom was seperated and getting a divorce. Mom kept asking if she was my gf I said no. Fast Forward we broke up Jan 03. Awhile later I was having an online arguement with her and mom says I swear you were more than friends. I said ya so and shes all you didn't have to lie about it. Nothing was said after that. Then I met my current gf and mom was out town for a month. I showed her pics of her online and on webcam and shes like is she your gf and was like not yet. I was going to wait until mom got home to meet her first but couldn't make it so we been together since 6-7-07.
My dad I came out to like a week after mom or so and I was talking to him and was all ya know "her" we were like more than friends. He doesn't care and tells my Aunt (his sis) that he loves lesbians. Although he still says things about meeting the right guy or something but I think thats just habbit to say those things for your only daughter and now child left since my bro died in car accident 2-0-03.
My family doesn't really talk about it too much. I was visiting my Gma (moms mom) and Aunt two years ago and randomly they were like you can adopt like Rosie O'Donnell. That suprised the sheet out of me. They have met my gf and like her a lot. I'm happy they like her. They didn't like my ex gf.