tcsced
09-06-2008, 01:51 AM
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_StandUpToCancer9-5-083-Copy.jpg
Ellen: "Thank you for your donation. And yes honey, I will pick up some glitter on the way home. Wait a minute, glitter?!!! What do you need glitter for? Damn, I have another caller! I'll call you back...you'd better not be up to no good! Is Mama at the house with you?"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/el12.jpg
Ellen: "He gets paid to play music and I get paid to dance to it! Now if we could just persuade Telepictures to hire a goat to eat Andy's cell phone, we would be in big business!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Dwight20Yoakam2C20Ellen20DeGeneres2.jpg
Ellen: "Picture it! 1990s...a young business man, a cowboy, and a girl pimp...without a grill!! Ah, good times!!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_2827268500_b237bf06bb_o2.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/2827268500_b237bf06bb_o2.jpg)
Ellen: "Okay, I'm going to teach you guys how to dance. We'll start with something easy...you put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and you shake it all about! Are you getting this yet?"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/1998VH1-81.jpg
Ellen: "Get up and try it again!! Do you not hear me? I feel like I've been talking to a brick wall!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaMalibu8-31-0895.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaMalibu8-31-0895.jpg)
Ellen: "Portia honey, do I have something stuck in my teeth?"
Portia: "Yeah, you have a corn kernel stuck in your two front teeth."
Ellen: "But I haven't eaten corn in a few weeks!! How could this be possible? OMG, this is freaky, what am I going to do? Where did this come from? Portia!!!"
Portia: "Honey, we shared a bag of popcorn while we were watching Lifetime movies last night."
Ellen: "Oh yeah."
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaRomeItaly6-30-0854.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaRomeItaly6-30-0854.jpg)
Portia: "Are you sure this is the way to the bathroom?"
Ellen: "That's what the guy said."
Portia: "Yes, but honey, he said it in Italian. How do we know what he really said?"
Ellen: "We don't. He could have been telling us to go take a hike...or a cobblestone stroll in this case for all we know!! I'm just going by that long line of women over there."
Portia: "I think they are getting some free chocolate samples. That's not the bathroom."
Ellen: Chocolate? Free? Good luck finding the bathroom honey, I'll see you later!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaWeddingDay8-16-0831.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaWeddingDay8-16-0831.jpg)
Ellen: "Let's have a staring contest!!"
Portia: "For how long?"
Ellen: "Until one of us messes up and laughs at the other one's!"
Portia: "Sandwiches?"
Ellen: "Damn, you're good!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-18-0523.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-18-0523.jpg)
Ellen: "Let's see how many people walk by and try to gues what's in your hand!"
Portia: "I don't even know what's in my hand! What did you put back there?"
Ellen: "Green slime from one of the giveaway bags for the celebrities backstage. It's supposed to be a great moisturizer for your skin."
Portia: "Well, great! At leaat I'll have the softest left hand within the whole Kodak Theatre! Thanks honey!! I'm touched."
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-16-07166.jpg
Portia: "Ellen, smile!"
Ellen: "I can't believe Ryan just did that!!"
Portia: "Honey, he can do whatever he wants...we're in a commercial break right now. Smile for the photographer!!"
Ellen: "Look again, what is he trying to do?"
Portia: "I think he's been trying to get a whole 12-inch sub into his mouth!"
Ellen: "No wonder they asked me to do the next segment...they knew Seacrest would by 'out'! Speaking of which, I need to go backstage and practice my lines, don't I?"
Portia: "Yeah, that MIGHT be a good thing for you to do."
Ellen: "Thank you for your donation. And yes honey, I will pick up some glitter on the way home. Wait a minute, glitter?!!! What do you need glitter for? Damn, I have another caller! I'll call you back...you'd better not be up to no good! Is Mama at the house with you?"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/el12.jpg
Ellen: "He gets paid to play music and I get paid to dance to it! Now if we could just persuade Telepictures to hire a goat to eat Andy's cell phone, we would be in big business!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Dwight20Yoakam2C20Ellen20DeGeneres2.jpg
Ellen: "Picture it! 1990s...a young business man, a cowboy, and a girl pimp...without a grill!! Ah, good times!!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_2827268500_b237bf06bb_o2.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/2827268500_b237bf06bb_o2.jpg)
Ellen: "Okay, I'm going to teach you guys how to dance. We'll start with something easy...you put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and you shake it all about! Are you getting this yet?"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/1998VH1-81.jpg
Ellen: "Get up and try it again!! Do you not hear me? I feel like I've been talking to a brick wall!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaMalibu8-31-0895.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaMalibu8-31-0895.jpg)
Ellen: "Portia honey, do I have something stuck in my teeth?"
Portia: "Yeah, you have a corn kernel stuck in your two front teeth."
Ellen: "But I haven't eaten corn in a few weeks!! How could this be possible? OMG, this is freaky, what am I going to do? Where did this come from? Portia!!!"
Portia: "Honey, we shared a bag of popcorn while we were watching Lifetime movies last night."
Ellen: "Oh yeah."
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaRomeItaly6-30-0854.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaRomeItaly6-30-0854.jpg)
Portia: "Are you sure this is the way to the bathroom?"
Ellen: "That's what the guy said."
Portia: "Yes, but honey, he said it in Italian. How do we know what he really said?"
Ellen: "We don't. He could have been telling us to go take a hike...or a cobblestone stroll in this case for all we know!! I'm just going by that long line of women over there."
Portia: "I think they are getting some free chocolate samples. That's not the bathroom."
Ellen: Chocolate? Free? Good luck finding the bathroom honey, I'll see you later!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaWeddingDay8-16-0831.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaWeddingDay8-16-0831.jpg)
Ellen: "Let's have a staring contest!!"
Portia: "For how long?"
Ellen: "Until one of us messes up and laughs at the other one's!"
Portia: "Sandwiches?"
Ellen: "Damn, you're good!!"
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/th_Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-18-0523.jpg (http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-18-0523.jpg)
Ellen: "Let's see how many people walk by and try to gues what's in your hand!"
Portia: "I don't even know what's in my hand! What did you put back there?"
Ellen: "Green slime from one of the giveaway bags for the celebrities backstage. It's supposed to be a great moisturizer for your skin."
Portia: "Well, great! At leaat I'll have the softest left hand within the whole Kodak Theatre! Thanks honey!! I'm touched."
http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f300/tcsced/Ellen_PortiaEmmys9-16-07166.jpg
Portia: "Ellen, smile!"
Ellen: "I can't believe Ryan just did that!!"
Portia: "Honey, he can do whatever he wants...we're in a commercial break right now. Smile for the photographer!!"
Ellen: "Look again, what is he trying to do?"
Portia: "I think he's been trying to get a whole 12-inch sub into his mouth!"
Ellen: "No wonder they asked me to do the next segment...they knew Seacrest would by 'out'! Speaking of which, I need to go backstage and practice my lines, don't I?"
Portia: "Yeah, that MIGHT be a good thing for you to do."